


Relapse and Progress

by snack_size



Series: Aftermath [3]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Chuck Lives, Developing Relationships, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, M/M, Major Character Injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-25
Updated: 2014-04-20
Packaged: 2018-01-10 00:37:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 21,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1152715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/snack_size/pseuds/snack_size
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Chuck's recovery from Striker Eureka's blast continues with Raleigh and Max by his side, everyone's relationships continue to develop - or not, and the surviving members of the PPDC Resistance try to determine how to transition and continue the mission of the organization post K-War.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Takes place after the events of the two previous stories in this universe, Disperse and Align and Converge and Dissolve.

Mako ran her fingers through her hair and sighed. There seemed to be more paperwork by the day - even though there were fewer people here than when they had been a resistance movement. But many of them were newcomers, and they had requests and tax documents to file, not to mention the project reports and project requests and the various proposals for how they could make use of all of the patents that the PPDC held.

“Here,” Tendo said. He leaned in and kissed the top of her head as he deposited some coffee on her desk. “Melanie Kircher flew out today.”

“Oh?” Mako said - she had not heard that this was planned. She had thought that the PR consultant would be with them for the foreseeable future. They certainly needed her. People kept requesting open and honest sit-downs with the four of them after their interviews from three days ago had gone out.

“Herc promoted her to working as our New York based liaison with the UN,” Tendo said.

Mako pressed her lips together. She did not understand why Herc would do that, considering how well Melanie had hit it off with Signe. Unless-

“Guess that sort of cooled off,” Tendo said.

“Pretty quickly,” Mako said.

“I don’t think it was that serious - more just to fuck with Chuck, making it seem like-” Tendo began.

“You know everything,” Mako said. “How is this? It is not your job.”

“Lots of time around the coffee machine,” Tendo said. “Back when we only had a coffee machine. And, I don’t know, people have always talked to me.” He smiled at her and she nodded her head. This was not something that had ever been the case with Mako. “Don’t work too hard.”

“Mmm,” Mako said. She knew what Tendo would say - at first, she had taken on a lot of new work because Herc needed to be with Chuck. Now, however, Chuck was back in his apartment. And he had Raleigh.

They could both probably manage paperwork, she thought.

“No,” Tendo said.

“No?”

“I know what you’re thinking, which is that Raleigh and Chuck could manage paperwork, and the answer is no, they cannot. There’s a reason that Herc always does Striker’s reports and it’s the same reason that Yancy-” Mako met Tendo’s eye. She felt bad, but she liked that she knew enough of Yancy from Raleigh to understand Tendo’s friendship with him. “Anyway. When they don’t want to do something? They have the attention span of...things with low attention spans. Something shiny or bulldog shape flits into their vision and its over.”

“Perhaps we could locate someone with a better attention span with some time on their hands?” Mako suggested.

“I’ll see what I can do,” Tendo replied.

Two hours later Hermann Gottlieb arrived in her office with baby Siggy strapped to his chest. “I was told you were in need of some assistance, Lt. Mori?” Mako balked at the new military rank, apparently assigned once she had become an active pilot.

“I...if you need to look after-”

“No, no, she mostly sleeps,” Hermann said.

“And your own research?” Mako felt bad. “You could do these in your lab while you-”

“I’ve completed and presented all calculations on the various probabilities of the Breach reopening,” Hermann said. “And I welcome the opportunity to get a bit of a reprieve from the...activity.” Mako nodded. Newt had been busy, the past two weeks, having finally got pickled samples from the majority of Otachi and Leatherback’s organs from Hannibal Chau.

“All right,” she said. “These are all requisition forms from the new, ah, employees and contractors,” she said. “You must match the code and ensure it is within their stipend.”

“Simple enough,” Dr. Gottlieb said, kissed the head of the sleeping baby, and began to work in earnest.

* * *

“You reassigned Melanie Kircher?” Mako asked, intercepting Herc as she walked back to her room to change into something comfortable before dinner.

“Ah,” said Herc. “Yeah - apparently, uh, she wanted to be closer to family? And things seemed to, uh...Stacker used to have to deal with that stuff?”

“Jaeger techs, engineers, were often reassigned,” Mako said.

“Yeah,” Herc replied. “Suppose so.” Mako thought it was sweet how close Herc had become with the doctor - she suspected that now, Chuck made up less than half of their conversations. Though now there was Elin, and that had to be a bit awkward. Herc acknowledged this thought with a little twist in his smile. “You all still going out for dinner tonight?”

“Ah, yes,” Mako replied. “We will give you a night of peace and quiet.”

“You’re taking Newt?” Herc asked. Mako laughed - Newt was not only elbow deep in kaiju guts but had also been quite talkative at the bar in the evenings now that Talya was away again, this time on a tour across Russia with some of the other Cherno engineers and techs. None of them would be able to get a word in edgewise if he came. Instead, they had asked if he would babysit Max.

“Poor Newt,” Mako said.

“Yeah, heard Gottlieb volunteered to be your administrative assistant,” Herc said. “Should of thought of that sooner.”

“It was Tendo’s idea,” Mako said.

“Mmm,” Herc said. “You should keep him around.” Mako felt herself blush - she intended to, though she was aware that some people thought that he was too old for her. She knew Stacker would have thought so, as well, though he had often spoken of how much he respected Tendo. She didn’t think that age really mattered. It was more important that there were basic experiences that they had shared. He had lost people who meant a lot to him - he had watched pilots he had been good friends with fall. He had lost nearly everyone.

Together, they had rebuilt Gipsy Danger. They could rebuild other things, as well.

“Good,” Herc said. “Enjoy your ah, double date.” He shook his head, then, though she knew it was more in reference to the term being applied to Chuck than anything. “Remind Chuck that Newt’s going to watch Max tonight, yeah?”

Mako nodded, even though she imagined it would be hilarious, to listen to Chuck rant about how he had walked in on his father making out with Elin when he took the dog to Herc instead.

* * *

“Really?” Chuck said, when she told him. He looked down at Max. “I don’t trust him.”

“Might try and produce some kind of bulldog-kaiju hybrid,” Raleigh said. “What? I was being serious.”

“Your father probably would like to have a quiet evening in,” Mako said.

“Uh,” said Chuck.

“You should be happy that he’s content, sexually-” Chuck put his hands over his ears and shook his head. Mako couldn’t help but catch the look on his face, though, as he pulled his hands down and one rubbed over the bald spot. Even after more than a month the hair was showing no sign of coming back. Chuck caught her glance and looked away.

“I’ll go drop Max off, spare you the trauma,” Raleigh said. He scooped Max up and gave Mako a slight smile, then lugged the dog out of the room as Max grumbled at him, perhaps protesting his treatment. Perhaps protesting being separated from Chuck. He had not left Chuck’s side since he had left the intensive care unit.

“Are you going to say something?” Chuck asked.

“About what?” Mako asked.

“Raleigh, me,” Chuck said. “You have to have some thoughts on it.”

Mako did. A lot of these thoughts were related to the person that she remembered Chuck being, and not the person that he had become. She had not been around much, this past month. From what she had seen of Chuck, though, she could tell he was different. Finally grown-up. Apparently almost dying and not coming back whole really changed a person. But it wasn’t just that - Raleigh wouldn’t have decided to sit with him, day after day, if he hadn’t seen something in Chuck from before. The Chuck who had punched him in the face. Mako would not have been nearly as charitable.

On the other hand, it was easy to see him as someone different because of how different he looked. It wasn’t just the scarring, which Chuck did his damndest to hide, but more acutely, the amount of space that he took up. Mako was used to Chuck being thick, large, imposing in the way he stomped around and took up space. Everything had changed in that description - well, except for that glower he had worked so hard to develop. It was not just the weight he had lost. He hunched, now, tried to collapse in on himself. Hoped no one noticed him.

“I am glad that you make each other happy.”

“Is that passive aggressive, Mako?” he asked.

“No, I do,” she replied. They seemed to be good for each other - they grounded each other, it seemed, and they genuinely cared for one another.

“He wants you to give him the shovel talk,” Tendo said, appearing in the doorway. “Don’t fuck with him, yeah? Been through enough. So have you. Feel better, Hansen? Glad we could get this out of the way before dinner.”

“Oh,” Chuck said.

“What is a shovel talk?” Mako asked.

“Oh, man, you guys need to...you missed a lot, I think, formative years interrupted by the K-War. Hey, Rals. Ready?”

“Yeah, Max is safely deposited,” Raleigh said. “Geiszler didn’t look like he was going to be doing any experiments tonight, so.”

Mako had made reservations at a restaurant she had on good authority was receiving decent steak and knew what to do with them. “Who’s driving?” Tendo asked, when they got down to the garage.

“I don’t know how,” said Mako, carefully. Chuck blinked and then shook his head.

“Is it automatic or standard?” Raleigh asked.

“OK, easy enough,” said Tendo. “Get in, kids, we’re going for steak.”

* * *

“Oh, I remember why we don’t go out more,” Raleigh said, after the third patron had come over to take a picture with him and Mako. Chuck had sort of ducked behind his cap, self-conscious, and got out of two of the pictures. “Although…” His mouth was actually watering as the steak approached their table.

It had to be a man thing. Mako had ordered a small, delicate ribeye for herself and was amazed at the massive hunks of meat that arrived on Tendo, Chuck and Raleigh’s plate.

“It’s been too long,” Tendo said, a sort of longing in his voice she had never heard before. She elbowed him for it and he grinned.

 _This was a normal thing that people did,_ Mako thought - something from before the K-War and maybe there were plenty of people who carried on doing these things after. It sort of scared her, because she had no idea how she was supposed to go about this. She laughed at some of Raleigh’s jokes and rolled her eyes when Chuck said something that demonstrated he hadn’t had a complete personality overhaul, but part of her felt strange and frozen.

“I understand, you know,” Tendo said when they were back in his room. He put his hands on Mako’s shoulders from behind her and she relaxed into his touch. “But it’s not like there are any rules you have to play by.”

“Yes,” Mako said, and that was it - the PPDC had always provided rules and guidelines and she had adhered to them strictly to make sensei proud, to ensure she would one day be a Jaeger pilot.

She turned and kissed Tendo, because she could think about this later. She smiled as his hand drifted down to her hip and rested there. “Let’s watch another episode,” he murmured into her skin. They had been working their way through one of Tendo’s favorite shows.

Mako nodded - this was good, and this was normal. He kissed her back.

* * *

“Wonder what happened there,” Raleigh said, head in Chuck’s lap as they watched a movie on his new television - they’d each gotten one, a few days ago, a thank you from Sony. The most advanced entertainment system in the world. You could talk to it and it would put on what you want - _Television, Lord of the Rings, please!_

“Where?” Chuck asked.

“Weren’t you paying attention?”

“To the movie, mate,” Chuck said.

“Melanie Kircher got reassigned to the UN,” Raleigh said.

“We better not get a different PR consultant,” Chuck said. “Television, pause movie.” Raleigh smiled. It was never going to get old.

“You’re admitting that you liked her?”

“She understood...Herc said she’s got family in Canada, New York, wanted to be close to them,” Chuck said.

Raleigh nodded, because he understood that whole argument. And he supposed a couple weeks with someone wasn’t enough time to figure out whether you wanted to upend your whole life for them.

 _There it is,_ he thought, and the problem was that neither he nor Chuck had a life to upend.

“Rals?”

“Just thinking,” he said. “Things just keep…”

“Changing?” Chuck suggested. “You liked it better when just got up, strapped yourself onto the wall, did some welding, collected some rations…” He didn’t mention the two other key parts to Raleigh’s day - work himself down to the bone with exercise, jogs in the cold frigid air, push-ups and elaborate crunches, squats and lunges. Then he would drink and hope that it would help him sleep.

“It was a routine,” Raleigh said. And before that things had been even more routine. The kaiju alarms had even fit in.

“I think whoever it was that Signe had, before…” Chuck said. It hung in the air for a moment.

“You’ve talked about this with her?” Raleigh asked. “You’re friends now?”

“Yeah, she’s...cranky, but she’s good,” Chuck said. Raleigh resisted the urge to poke him - Chuck was self-aware enough, now, it seemed, that it wasn’t necessary though. He was probably self-aware before. No one gave him enough credit. He knew that he was taking that bomb into the breach to die. “We spent a lot of quality time together.”

Raleigh sat up so that he could kiss Chuck.

Chuck kissed back, slow and easy. He put his hand in Raleigh’s hair and worked his fingers through it - it was almost like he scratched Max, which was cute. “Tired,” he said, and there was a reluctance to it, like Chuck was flinching.

“Hey, I know,” Raleigh said. He was sort of waiting for this to be brought up. He didn’t want to think of him as delicate, but he was. Raleigh knew Chuck didn’t think of himself this way - especially now that he was finally back in the gym, working out on the rowing machine and doing some light lifting. It wasn’t going to be until he got his first infection or his first cold. Not that Raleigh ever wanted it to happen. But from what he read it was inevitable, at some point.

“Well, it’s just, I know…” Chuck looked up at him, brow furrowed.

“What?” Raleigh asked. “You think people fuck every night?” At first he thought that he shouldn’t bring Chuck’s condition - Chuck’s health was probably a better way to phrase it - into it, but then he decided that there was no point in pretending it wasn’t there. “You’re tired, I’m tired.”

“OK,” Chuck said.

“You don’t sound OK,” Raleigh replied. He twisted so he could cup Chuck’s jaw and then kissed him lightly. “I want you to be comfortable-”

“Well, that’s not likely,” Chuck said and his posture instantly stiffened. Raleigh couldn’t resist the urge to wince, not sure what he had done to set Chuck off. “Sorry, it’s just...I’m not, oi? Like this, I’m…”

“I know, Chuck,” Raleigh said. “But that’s - I know, OK?”

Chuck relaxed slightly and met Raleigh’s eyes and sighed. “People don’t fuck every night?”

“No, they...you know, honey, I have a headache, I’m tired, bloated, kids are crying, dog is snoring…” Max, thankfully, issued a large snorting snore to punctuate this point. “We can go to bed.”

Chuck nodded, apparently still trying to ruminate over this. He seemed to take Raleigh’s word for it, though - but Raleigh couldn’t wait for him to go up to people in the Shatterdome and try and get them to talk to him about how often they had sex with their partner. Raleigh decided it would probably be good idea to maneuver Mako into that conversation.

“So we can go to bed,” Chuck said. No question mark, and Raleigh was glad that it was missing.

“Absolutely,” Raleigh said, and he reached over and stroked Max's head to get the dog to wake up. “C’mon, wrinkly butt.”

“Most of my butt is smooth,” Chuck said, and for a brief moment Raleigh thought that he had said something just really terrible, but then Chuck gave him the smallest hint of a smile when he met his eyes. “Max, bed.”

Max opened his eyes, then, and wiggled his tail. Max was largely only motivated by two different times of the day - mealtime and bedtime. _He would have really got on with Yancy,_ Raleigh thought.

“Raleigh?”

“He would have really got along with Yancy,” Raleigh said. “Favorite times of day - bedtime and mealtime.” Chuck nodded his head, slowly, as Max jumped off of the couch at the second mention of bedtime and trotted towards the bedroom.

Chuck gave Raleigh a light peck on the lips before he head into the bathroom. Raleigh followed after him and cupped his ass as he stood in front of the toilet. “Can I piss in peace?”

Chuck rolled his eyes as Raleigh grabbed his toothbrush.

* * *

“And here it is,” said Herc, the next evening, setting a large box down on the top of the bar. “State of the art systems to go with the new enormous television.”

“Oi, the video game thing?” Chuck asked. “What system did you get?”

“All of them,” Herc said, and there was a gleam in his eyes that made Raleigh smile. “I figure we set up the Nintendo, first, though, someone mentioned something about Mario Kart?”

“I am very good at Mario Kart,” Mako said. She glanced over at Raleigh and he shrugged his shoulders - he had never really had gaming systems growing up. Any exposure he had was at friend’s houses, and they were usually so much better practiced than him that it was pointless to really try.

They had the one system hooked up to the television fairly quickly, and soon Mako and Herc sat down with their drinks and controllers. Everyone else at the bar clustered around, and Elin leaned forward and whispered something in Herc’s ear that made him grin as he chose his little character.

“Why the mushroom dude?” Raleigh asked Mako.

“He is fast and light,” Mako replied. She was serious about this - Raleigh wondered where this had come from. Then again, Mako was serious about everything that she undertook.

“I’ll play loser,” Newt said.

“I am looking forward to it,” Mako said.

Chuck shook his head and glanced at Raleigh. It took about two minutes for Raleigh to realize why. Mako might have been good, but it was hard to judge because Herc was owning her - flinging items into her path, picking up all of the bonuses offered, and getting to the finish of the course like it was nothing. Mako’s mouth opened slightly as she regarded Herc, then she closed it.

“Oi, what do you think all those RAAF bastards did in their spare time?” Chuck asked. Herc grinned up at Elin, who responded in the only rational way possible, which was with a curt Scandinavian nod.

“Nerds, too, looking for distractions from their dissertations,” Newt said, when Mako handed him the controller. That race was closer, but Herc still dominated. Raleigh sipped at his drink, smiling - Herc was smiling and trash talking, and it was easy to get an image of him in his twenties, sitting around in some military barracks with his friends, drinking beer.

“I’ll have a go,” Tendo said, though he didn’t fare any better. Chuck leaned against Raleigh, putting his shoulder on his head, and Raleigh stroked the back of his neck for a moment. A thought poked at him - had Chuck been more tired lately, overall? Was it because he was back in the gym?

Raleigh shook his head - he’d sat in with Signe and Chuck while she discussed his immune system and how it was likely to function now. If he had a virus, some bacteria, whatever, it would announce itself rather than sneak up on them. It had been just a little more than a month - Chuck still needed plenty of recovery. He’d barely survived an atomic blast. Raleigh had to keep reminding himself he had to be realistic, he couldn’t baby him, or he would drive him way.

“Oh, fuck, c’mon!” Tendo shouted.

“Eat it, Choi,” Herc said. Chuck rolled his eyes, but it was good to see Herc with a smile on his face - even if it was manic and gleeful, and, Raleigh imagined, probably the sort of smile that Herc had on his face when he bashed Isonade’s face into that cliff. When he crossed the victory line, he looked around the bar. “Who’s next?”

“You’ve created a monster,” someone said, and Chuck turned and grinned at one of Striker’s old techs.

“I had nothing to do with it,” Chuck said, as one of the Chinese chemical engineers stepped up to take on Herc. “Mako was the one that said something about Mario Kart.”

“I did not know,” Mako said. She drank almost all of her beer and then shook her head.

“I would never have…” Tendo said, and then shook his own head. “No, nevermind. Your dad was a total bro, back in the day, wasn’t he? Beer guzzling, had a bunch of stupid t-shirts-”

“How is that any different from what he does now?” Chuck asked. “Man’s got a tattoo of Australia on his arm.”

“It is a very good tattoo,” Elin said, and Signe snickered, just turning up with drink refills for those who needed them.

“Oi, no disrespecting the tattoo!” Herc shouted while flying his car over one of the computer competitors. “Or should we talk about yours?”

“No, s’good,” Chuck said, quickly.

“What is wrong with it?” Raleigh asked - and then knew he had hit something golden, because Mako and Tendo were both attempting to hold their smiles in. Raleigh raised his eyebrows and smiled at Chuck.

“S’Striker’s logo-”

“If I remember, correctly…” Tendo said and then he barely dodged an elbow to his ribs from Chuck. “Raleigh needs to know what he’s getting into!”

“He’s already gotten into it!” Chuck replied, and Raleigh closed his eyes and shook his head.

“Really?” Tendo asked. “Never thought you would-”

“I am not hearing you talk about my boy like that-” Herc interjected.

“No, more distraction, Choi,” said Herc’s competitor.

“It was not the logo when Chuck was tattooed,” Mako said. “It was initially a blonde woman riding a bomb.”

“Official story,” said Tendo, quickly, dancing away from another one of Chuck’s elbows.

“Wait, did you change the-” Chuck narrowed his eyes at him and shook his head. “You wanted a tattoo of Max with a missile in his mouth?” Raleigh issued an embarrassing sort of seal laugh as Chuck shook his head.

“Had to spare him,” said Herc, soundly defeating the Chinese engineer. “C’mon, then, who’s next?”

“It is time,” said Elin. She raised her eyebrows at Signe.

“Fuck’s sake,” said Signe, and she took the controller. “You would think…”

Raleigh grinned at Chuck since he was still scowling. “It’s adorable,” he said.

“I am not-”

“Oh, look,” Mako said, and she nudged them. Signe flung a shell at Herc, knocking him off of his course. Then she managed to do a maneuver that Raleigh figured, from his scant viewing of Mario Kart, was pretty ridiculous before she grabbed a hyper-reward and shot past some of the computer characters. She picked up another shell and struck Herc from some distance.

“Suck my cock, Hansen,” said Signe, whipping a shell at him. “And my shell.”

“I would, if you had one,” Herc replied.

“Oh God,” Raleigh said, because he was willing to bet- “ Please.” Signe laughed, indicating that she had heard him.

“I don’t-” Chuck began, but Mako shook her head at him and made a slight shushing sound. Then they all turned as Herc cursed and was knocked off of the road by Signe, who then proceeded across the line to victory.

“Again,” Herc said.

“Then you can suck my cock,” Signe replied, and turned and winked at Raleigh.

“Why does she keep saying that?” Chuck asked when Signe chose the next race course for them.

“I do not want to know, you do not want to know,” Elin said. Chuck met her eyes and nodded his head.

“I was fifteen, by the way, Raleigh,” Chuck said.

“What?”

“The tattoo,” Chuck said.

“I said it was cute,” Raleigh replied. He had never got a tattoo - but he had some pretty stupid ideas for them, and thankfully had Yancy around to talk him out of it. Chuck just took a long sip from his beer.

“I’ll get you, you know,” Chuck said to Tendo. “I’m sure there’s plenty of stuff I know about Mako-”

“How is that getting Tendo?” Mako asked. “Oh, nevermind.”

Chuck tapped his forehead and nodded his head.

“Goddamnit!” said Herc, and he looked over and glared at Signe. She shrugged her shoulders like it wasn’t any big thing. It was very clear, in that moment, that Herc Hansen was not used to losing.

“Going to throw your controller, Hansen?” she asked.

“No,” he said. His mouth was tight, and Raleigh was not the only one who was resisting the urge to laugh. “I will buy you a drink like an adult.”

“We don’t pay for the drinks,” Chuck said.

“Stay out of this, Chuck,” Herc said, and he and Signe both stood up.

“Wanna go?” Raleigh asked, seizing the opportunity. Chuck nodded his head.

 _This is good,_ Raleigh thought, rubbing Chuck’s lower back as he sat down in front of the screen. It was a surprising thought to have. A good thing in and of itself.

He’d felt this way before. _Stop it,_ he told himself, and grinned as Chuck picked the little villain characters to drive his car.

“Seriously?” Chuck asked, when Raleigh selected the princess.

“Absolutely,” Raleigh replied.

“I’m gonna kick your pink-skirted ass,” Chuck said.

Raleigh just grinned back at him.


	2. Chapter 2

“They want to do more test drifts,” Mako said. She looked up and met Tendo's eye. She was picking at her noodles and Tendo was being quiet, which meant he was going to wait her out. He was quite skilled at that game.

“You don’t want to drift with Raleigh?” he asked. “I mean, I get it, I wouldn’t want to see him and Chuck-”

“I will gladly,” Mako said. “But they are seeking non-combat prototypes. They wish to see…”

“How someone who hasn’t been through Ranger training will do?” Tendo asked. “Makes sense, since we’re looking at peacetime applications…” Mako nodded.

“You would have to train potential applicants,” said Tendo. “And test them.”

“Raleigh or Chuck would have to,” Mako said, finally getting to the root of the problem. Neither she nor Herc had the time. She respected each of them, knew them to be excellent pilots. But each had their drawbacks - Chuck had only ever drifted with Herc, where the connection was initially strong and anchored by someone incredibly experienced. Raleigh had the two different experiences, but one was quite traumatic and, if called on to drift with any of his students, could overwhelm them.

“Get them both to do it,” Tendo said. “Neither has anything to do.”

“It is possible,” Mako said. “I just wonder...even if they are together, it still may be...contentious.”

Tendo shrugged his shoulders and then smiled at her. “I forget, you were always working with Pentecost. You never got to experience how quickly things degenerated when he wasn’t around.”

“There were other Marshals,” Mako said.

“Not like him,” Tendo replied. Mako smiled softly and bowed her head.

“I will suggest this to them,” she said, and then sighed. “Thankfully I can think of some suitable candidates.” Tendo cocked his head. “Well, we have a sibling pair at our disposable…”

“Fair enough,” he replied.

* * *

Mako approached Raleigh first, during Chuck’s physical therapy. “I would like to be helpful,” Raleigh said. “I mean, that was why I started to sit with Chuck.”

Mako nodded, though she suspected that there was something else behind that decision as well - even if Raleigh wasn’t exactly aware of it then. Then she realized Raleigh was trying to say something else. “You have been an important support for all of us,” she said.

“Shatterdome husband,” Raleigh said. Mako shook her head slightly. “Um, house husband. Like...shit, I don’t know the Japanese.” She pulled her phone out and quickly punched something in. It was rare she would not know the English for something - and it was generally something like this, an American pop culture term, usually from before the K-War. Still, it annoyed her.

“Perhaps,” she said, and smiled at Raleigh. “We will first need to find suitable candidates for the testing. Then you will have to work through the standard training with them.”

“Just test everyone for compatibility,” Raleigh said. “Then toss together-” Mako furrowed her brow. “That’s what they did when we all turned up at the Jaeger Academy...I mean, some of us, we came with people, but I know siblings who turned up together and they sent them off with someone from halfway around the world.”

Mako considered this - she had known this, of course. She had been one of the people to come to the Academy without a partner and had been paired, like Chuck, with the advanced simulator for training purposes. There weren’t very many people in her Academy class. At that point people had become aware of the fact that Jaeger pilots were becoming cannon fodder. “I suppose so,” she said. “It would be your program to run with Chuck-”

“With Chuck?” Raleigh asked.

“Yes,” said Mako. “You two are the only others with experience.”

“You and Herc think that will work?” Mako could not tell if this was a passive aggressive statement or not.

“Yes,” she said. “As does Tendo.”

“Huh,” Raleigh said, and smiled at her. “Well.”

“Raleigh,” Mako said. “It is mostly Chuck.”

“You obviously don’t remember the shit Yancy and I did when we got bored in the Icebox in the drift,” Raleigh replied. Mako sighed - she had tried to forget about the eating contests and scavenger hunts that the two had staged.

They waited outside the hall for Chuck. “Oi, what’d I do?” he asked, running his hand through his hair.

“Mako has a job proposal for us,” Raleigh said.

Chuck grinned at her. “Over lunch OK?” he said, and Mako nodded. “Heard you have a new assistant.”

“Dr. Gottlieb has been a big help,” Mako replied. Raleigh looked at her and arched an eyebrow - as though Mako should have alerted him to this. Perhaps he was not aware of his own noted difficulties with paperwork completion. “Tendo suggested that your skills may be put to better use than paperwork.”

“That means you’re hopeless at it,” Chuck said.

“Yancy always did them,” Raleigh said.

“Exactly,” said Chuck. “Herc did ours - said I took too long. What are you gonna have us do, then, Mako? Tour guides?”

Mako was almost pleased that he was as prickly as she remembered him - but then she chided herself. Wanting Chuck to be the same was just like wanting everything else to be the same. She resisted the urge to laugh. After everything, Mako would have thought one thing that she would not have any difficulty with would be adapting to new circumstances.

“In order to determine what possible uses there may be for the drift technology-”

“We’re just gonna let that out into the wild?” Chuck asked, as they entered the cafeteria.

“No,” Mako said. “We need to manage the patent and its applications, though. Some usage should prevent those we would like to keep from it from attempting to reverse engineer it.” Chuck nodded his head.

“Nice in theory,” Chuck said.

“Have some faith,” said Raleigh - and Mako caught just the slightest hitch to his voice.

“Oi, there was a reason why there were fewer large scale conflicts during the Cold War and the K-War than any other period in time,” Chuck replied. He sat down at the table and winced slightly.

“You all right?” Raleigh asked. Chuck waved his hand. “Anyway, Mako wants us to train some of the, uh, civilians to use the drift. I’ll get the food.”

He stood, leaving Chuck with Mako. “They just want data, or they want people to test things?” Chuck asked.

“Just data, at this point,” Mako said. “The neurologists and engineers would like some data that is not based on pairings trained for combat or that come from combat situations.”

“Sounds like a pretty big project,” Chuck said, and then he shifted in his seat and winced again.

“Are you all right?” Mako asked.

“Sore,” he said. “Laid in a bed for three weeks doing shit all, so…” He met Mako’s eyes and held them, and Mako nodded her head.

“It will be a big project,” Mako said. “You will first have to find drift compatible pairs.”

“Right, but it’s just for them to…” Chuck held her eyes. It took Mako a moment to realize he anticipated a response. “I mean, you have to have something for them to do. Can’t just sit there. Or you won’t get any readings, right? Drift is silence.”

“Ah,” Mako said. “Yes, I do not believe the research team considered that.”

“They could play fucking Mario Kart,” Chuck said. His smile was slight and wry.

“Yes, that is a possibility,” Mako said, and she was relieved when Raleigh arrived with a large tray laden with the family style offerings for their lunch. “Ah, excellent,” Mako couldn’t help but say when she saw the Kung Pao Chicken Raleigh had brought back. 

She did not know why Chuck still rankled her. She had got her opportunity, after all. She had avenged her family - her parents, Sasha and Aleksis, the Weis, and, eventually, Stacker. _He has channelled his anger in a different direction,_ Stacker had said to her, once, and she always thought that there was a lot more that he thought about Chuck. But Stacker would not share this, likely out of respect for Herc and for Chuck. She also knew that she had been envious of Chuck for more than just his ability to pilot at fifteen. She had never understood his anger, when he still had one parent. A parent who had shown he valued Chuck more than anything.

“There will be many people interested,” Mako said, carefully serving herself chicken over her rice.

“Just to experience it,” Raleigh said.

“Good,” Chuck added. “Less people to ask me what it felt like, witnessing the moment of my conception. Like Herc knew the night he hit it for six.” Raleigh just shook his head, and Mako had to smile - pilots were all told that you had to be able to handle the innermost thoughts of your fellow pilot with grace and tact. You could not be easily embarrassed and be able to drift. The worst you could do, her instructor told them, was to try and hide anything. The Becket brothers had taken this to heart and just left it all open. She had seen far more Yancy Becket than she may have liked to. 

“What do they want to do with the tech?” Raleigh asked.

“There are no...concrete proposals yet,” said Mako. “They will better decide with more data. Construction, engineering, they are most likely. Perhaps medical, using robots who can do what humans cannot.” This struck something, with Chuck, and she could only imagine where it touched upon his own experiences.

He coughed, to deflect. It was a standard Chuck strategy. “Maybe I should drift with Max, oi?” he asked, and fed a bit of chicken to the dog dutifully sitting at his feet. “Lot to learn there.”

“No,” said Raleigh. “That is a stupid-”

“Geiszler got to drift with a mostly dead kaiju brain - and a sort of fetus kaiju, so-”

“You will have to wait for the next end of the world,” Mako said, hoping the statement would be taken as the sort of joke that she intended. “And for the apocalypse to be dog related.”

“I can’t imagine any possible correlation between dogs and the apocalypse,” Raleigh said, completely seriously. Mako nudged him under the table with her foot and he smiled at her.

* * *

“Ranger Mori?” Hermann asked, and she startled. She hadn’t realized she had started to just stare at the baby. She was sort of mesmerizing - so small, and yet perfectly formed. She had a significant amount of dark hair on her head and her small hands clenched and unclenched in her sleep.

“I am sorry,” she said. “I am just...the baby just sleeps through it,” she said, and then blinked, because she felt a bit stupid for saying it.

“Oh, yes,” said Hermann, looking up from his paperwork. “I had a professor in university who would teach with his son strapped to him. The child would barely stir.”

“That is...well,” Mako said. She had nothing to say. She knew nothing about babies.

“Well, at this stage, they spend a good deal of time sleeping,” said Hermann. “Either that or eating, or..expelling what they eat, one way or the other.” He grimaced slightly at this. “Funnily enough, my experience with Dr. Geiszler has prepared me for parenthood in more ways than one.” This was the most she had heard him speak in some time - well, on something not related to Dr. Geiszler.

Mako smiled at this. “May I ask a personal question?”

“Of course,” Hermann said, and he set his pen down and met her eyes. “We thought...perhaps it was selfish, but it seemed, in the face of looming apocalypse, perhaps...well, as Vanessa put it - why not do something just so wildly against the odds? It was not planned.” Hermann pressed his lips together and then leaned down so he could put a slight kiss against his child’s head.

It only occurred to Mako after he answered that she had not actually posed a question. “You must get tired of explaining that.”

“No, it is a valid question,” Hermann said. “It can come across as irresponsible.”

“Responsible,” said Mako, and shook her head. “I do not think there was any way to be responsible, with…” She often wondered how much ordinary people knew - or how much they were willing to admit. They couldn’t have thought, after Mutavore, that the Wall would save them. They couldn’t have thought that moving away from the coast would suffice. Yet society still carried on and people still went to their jobs, still paid their bills.

Worse, she realized - she might have to be responsible now. Not that she was ever not, but she had certainly made some choices with the conscious disregard for her own safety. Other things were more important than being responsible.

And wasn’t that what she was doing, being responsible - still sitting in the Shatterdome and dutifully completing paperwork, managing the new influx of personnel and their changing needs still met the mandate of the mission. To make sure the PPDC still honored what Stacker had wanted the organization to stand for, when it became a resistance?

Someone had to, though. The Jaeger technology had to be kept close - it could not get into the hands of the wrong people, the wrong governments. It would be the next nuclear arms race, but people would be much less cautious about using the Jaegers. The effects would initially be seen as not sure dire.

“It has defined us for so long,” Hermann said. “Think how long it took to adapt when they first came through - do not expect this adjustment to be easy.”

“You are right,” Mako said. She smiled at Hermann and he smiled back at her.

* * *

Hermann came with her down to the bar that evening after passing Siggy off to Vanessa. “Well, this is new,” he said, glancing at the television where two of the Crimson Typhoon engineers had challenged each other to Mario Kart. After the first evening they had moved it over to a corner so that the noise and heckling didn’t distract everyone else’s socialization efforts.

“It’s a constantly evolving space, Hermann,” said Newt. “Organic, even, like all of life tends to be-”

“Many facets of our life are inorganic,” Mako said. Newt opened his mouth but stopped when Hermann gave him one of his legendary glares. Mako did not understand why her comment deserved that sort of protection until she realized that Hermann likely thought she meant the Jaegers. “Would you like something to drink?” she asked.

“I would appreciate a beer, Ranger Mori,” said Hermann.

“Christ’s sake, how long have you been working with her and with the baby and you still can’t-” Mako walked away as Newt flapped his hands at Hermann.

“Oh, you come here too?” Raleigh asked as she stepped up to the bar.

“Sometimes,” she replied. “Have you got many volunteers?” She had deleted Raleigh and Chuck’s draft of the e-mail asking for volunteers for compatibility testing and had instead written her own, then had Hermann proof-read it for her.

“You know, some people appreciate a sense of humor, Mori,” Chuck said, leaning forward. She hadn’t even realized he was next to Raleigh. He was getting almost skilled at hiding himself.

“Yes,” she said. “But official communication will be seen by many people other than those you intend,” she replied. “Use your sense of humor when you speak with your volunteers.”

“We have a lot already,” Raleigh said. “So we can start administering the brain scans and everything tomorrow.”

“Good,” she said. She collected her beer and vodka iced tea and walked back over towards Hermann.

“Are there other games that came with that machine?” he asked her, even though Newt was still arguing with him about something.

“Yes, I believe so. Many. I saw Tetris, which-”

Both of them got a gleam in their eye that she recognized and knew was dangerous. It was likely the look that Newt had in his eyes after he had constructed his pons out of garbage and was about to drift with the remnant of the kaiju.

“Hey, assholes! When you’re done with your little pissing contest over there-”

“They would like to start their own,” Mako said, putting her hand on Newt’s arm. She was amazed when he actually stopped speaking. Talya had domesticated a bit, it appeared.

“I’m pretty good at Tetris, actually,” Raleigh said, and then he looked innocently over at Chuck. “What? We had that one as a kid.”

* * *

After his resounding thumping at Tetris by Hermann, Raleigh was pleased when Chuck kissed his neck and said, “Maybe call it a night, oi?”

“I like that,” Raleigh said. He had been truthful, in their earlier conversation, but he also wanted to get his hands on him. Raleigh held back, though, didn’t want Chuck to think that he hadn’t been genuine with what he said. So he let Chuck take the lead, and guide him over to the couch. Then Raleigh kissed him, slowly working his tongue into Chuck’s mouth and sliding it against Chuck’s tongue. “Chuuck,” he groaned, as Chuck kissed at his neck again.

Then he pulled himself into Raleigh’s lap, which was - Chuck wrapped his legs around him so that he could use his thighs to bounce and shift if he needed to. Raleigh really liked the sensation of a lapful of Chuck, though he couldn’t help but reflect that he should be heavier. He couldn’t help but remember his initial impressions of Chuck. First, when he had walked into the Shatterdome and then again when he had sat down across from him in the cafeteria. Raleigh had definitely thought he was hot, initially, and then when he saw him in that tight fitting shirt he had been even more attracted to how broad and thick he was.

Chuck was kissing him hard, and Raleigh focused back on that, getting more assertive with his own lips and tongue. Raleigh ducked his head and pulled his mouth down Chuck’s neck. He was able to smell the mint and tea tree oil that was supposedly in his antibacterial shampoo and body soap. “Fuck, Raleigh,” Chuck murmured.

Then Chuck slid down and spread Raleigh’s legs apart. He hadn’t really been assertive like this, yet, and Raleigh’s cock got a bit harder at the thought.

Chuck pulled his zipper down and Raleigh lifted his hips so Chuck could get his pants around near his ankle. “Chuck, I - yes, fuck…” Raleigh murmured, and Chuck put his mouth to Raleigh’s boxer briefs and kissed at his erection, then sucked on it a bit. _Where..?_ Raleigh thought, but it didn’t matter.

Chuck tugged his briefs down and Raleigh helped him. Chuck put his mouth to the head and teased his tongue around it, slow and twisting, licking each inch of Raleigh. “Fuck, I - oh, Chuck,” Raleigh said, and Chuck pushed him back into the couch and put his hands on either side of Raleigh’s hips. He slowly took his cock in. Raleigh groaned and put his hands in Chuck’s hair as he bobbed up and down, mouth warm and sucking him, pulling him deeper. “You are - this is so fucking good, Chuck,” he said.

Chuck hummed and then glanced up when he had most of Raleigh in his mouth. Raleigh moaned as their eyes met, then Chuck moved one hand to his cock and began to pump at his base as he slid his mouth over and around him. He pulled out and then licked a strip up with his tongue, slid it around the head, teased Raleigh for what felt like minutes, pulling at each little nerve ending and making Raleigh keen up and feel a deep yearning.

Then Chuck was bobbing his mouth again. He drew it out, brought Raleigh close and then slowed.

Raleigh tugged at his hair, not sure what his end game was. Chuck hummed around his cock again and Raleigh let himself relax, instantly felt his orgasm begin to build as Chuck increased the speed and suction around his cock. “Chuck, I’m...I’m…” It built in him in progressive waves and then his balls were tightening, his vision narrowed. He came in short, staccato bursts and Chuck sucked at it, some of it spilling out of his mouth a bit. He wiped with his hand before he looked up at Raleigh.

“Chuck, I….fuck,” Raleigh said.

“Maybe a tissue?” Chuck said.

“Maybe you use that to touch yourself with,” Raleigh replied - and he felt himself go a bit red, he hadn’t really meant for that to come out. Chuck met his eyes, though, and grinned slightly. He held the hand in the air as he got back on the couch and settled in next to Raleigh.

Raleigh helped him get out of his sweats and grinned to see Chuck’s cock against his skin. His eyes couldn’t help but stray, still, to the ridges and bumps of Chuck’s skin, one particularly angry mountain range near his belly button. But then he watched as Chuck slicked his cock with Raleigh’s come and grinned at Raleigh as he did it.

Chuck groaned a bit as he stroked his hand up and down over his cock, and Raleigh took the opportunity while he was distracted to reach between his legs and roll his balls. “Raleigh…”

“What do you want, Chuck?” Raleigh asked. He leaned in and kissed at Chuck’s neck, sliding his tongue over the ridges near his earlobe. Chuck just made this sound, like it was a bit too much for him, and Raleigh tightened his hold on his balls. “You can fuck me...or I can suck you off...just touch you…”

“I, fuck,” Chuck said, and he bit at his lower lip slightly. “I want to fuck you, Raleigh, I-”

“Bed,” Raleigh said, and he grasped Chuck’s wrist to get him to stop from touching himself - good as the sight was.

Chuck moved quickly - his ribs finally seemed to have stopped bothering him so much - and Raleigh slid onto the bed and pulled his legs up for Chuck. “God, look at you, Raleigh,” Chuck said. Raleigh remembered, then, that he’d opened himself the last time. He reached into the drawer and then tossed the lube at Chuck.

“Just real easy, Chuck, just the one first,” he said, and moaned as Chuck slipped his finger into him.

“Fuck,” Chuck said. “So tight.”

“Yeah,” Raleigh said. “Slide it in and out - yeah, like that, like you’re fucking me-” Chuck groaned, at this, but moved his finger slowly in and out of Raleigh, “-then sort of move it around, spread me, and curl it, a little, like…ah, just like that, Chuck, so good, and you can...another, yeah?” Chuck nodded. He was really concentrating, trying to master this new skill, and the expression on his face was overwhelming and adorable. Raleigh moaned as Chuck worked him, slowly, followed Raleigh’s direction and added the third finger. “Good, now, Chuck, you can-”

Raleigh spread his legs further. Chuck winced, slightly, shifting his position and kneeling in front of Raleigh. He grasped his cock and Raleigh grinned at the image. Chuck looked good, because, for a moment, his posture was straight and he wasn’t self-conscious - and the width to his shoulders was back, the same sort of expression on his face. “Raleigh?” The tone was a little self-conscious, though.

“Chuck, yeah, I want…fuck me, Chuck,” he said. Chuck nodded, pressed his cock against Raleigh’s hole and then ran his hands down Raleigh’s legs. Once Chuck thrust in Raleigh pressed back against him. Chuck moaned.

“Raleigh, that’s-”

“Chuck, I want to feel you-” Raleigh said, and that was enough. Chuck slid inside him, slow at first but then with increasing speed on each thrust. He lowered himself slowly and Raleigh reached around and grasped his back and slowly ran his fingers across Chuck’s skin. Chuck was making soft noises against him and Raleigh let himself sink into the sensations - Chuck, filling him, inside him, his weight on Raleigh, his lips on Raleigh’s neck and shoulder. “Chuck, this is...so...fucking good, this is…”

“Raleigh, I’m-” Chuck said, and Raleigh grinned and canted his hips to get the contact he needed against his prostate. “Oh, god, fuck, I-” Raleigh reached and grasped his own cock, fisting himself along with Chuck’s thrusts.

“Yes, Chuck, it’s right there, Chuck, this is - right there, Chuck,” Raleigh began to babble, continued to babble as Chuck pressed harder inside him, got tighter and closer to Raleigh. He pressed his lips against Chuck’s and kissed him hard. “Chuck!” That was all it took and Chuck came undone inside him, mouth twisting open and low groan pouring out of him.

Raleigh finished himself with two hard jerks and then kissed Chuck again, slow and deep.

“That was...I mean, not that, uh, before, wasn’t…” Chuck said, pulling up slightly on his arms to meet Raleigh’s gaze.

“I know,” Raleigh said. “It’s...well, we’re bound to improve, right?”

“Right,” Chuck agreed. Then he sighed softly and slowly rolled off of Raleigh. He winced, again. Raleigh just raised his eyebrows - he had told himself that he wasn’t going to be Chuck’s nurse, he wasn’t going to be a nag.

“Just sore,” Chuck said, and sighed. “Probably always going to be just sore.”

“Yeah,” Raleigh said, and then he rolled onto his side so he could push Chuck’s hair out of his face. It was shaggy looking and soft. Raleigh liked it. He liked the scruff that Chuck was growing, as well, and so he dragged his thumb along it. Chuck laughed, slightly, and then grinned at him.

“Don’t wanna look like Herc,” he said.

“He’s shaving now,” Raleigh replied. “He has to look…”

“Dignified,” Chuck supplied. Raleigh nodded, though he was surprised Chuck hadn’t noticed this. Then again, Chuck had a lot on his mind. “I should go and get Max,” Chuck said, and Raleigh nodded. He was slowly getting used to having Max in bed with him - the dog managed to somehow wedge himself between Raleigh and Chuck and still sleep on top of Raleigh’s ass or balls.

“OK,” Raleigh said. Chuck narrowed his eyes at him and Raleigh grinned - apparently his tone hadn’t been appropriate sincere.

“You want a dog of your own, Rals?”

Raleigh considered this. Getting a dog was sort of serious, right? Though Chuck seemed to lack the same socialization as Raleigh, so it was possible it didn’t mean anything - it could mean that Chuck just wanted a puppy. “You and Max are more than enough for me to handle,” he said.

Chuck grinned back at him and wiggled into his sweat pants. He leaned down and kissed Raleigh. “Be right back.”

* * *

“OK, hello,” Raleigh said to their forty-some odd volunteers, all looking a combination of eager or anxious as they sat in the chairs in front of him, Chuck, and Tendo. “I’m Raleigh Becket, this is Tendo Choi, and Chuck Hansen.” Tendo straightened his back, emphasizing his bow tie, and Chuck gave one of those scowling nods of his.

“We’re going to start with doing the most basic compatibility tests,” Tendo said. “Each person will need to hook up to a monitor and do a variety of exercises on the computers up here,” he said. “We’re going to schedule you for times. Tomorrow we’ll do more in-depth brain scans and, from there, we’ll run things through the computer and start to figure out if we have any pairings.”

Raleigh nodded and then assisted getting everyone signed up for times and then attaching the monitoring gear to the heads of their first test subjects. He decided he should probably think of them as something else - potential drift partners? Volunteers? That might work.

“You want the nodes right on your forehead,” he said, adjusting them on one of Striker’s crew members.

“We gonna get to do it out in the kwoon?” another Aussie asked Chuck.

“No,” said Tendo. “We’re specifically looking at pairings not based on combat compatibility.”

“You guys are no fun.”

“Yeah, well, this is important scientific research,” said Chuck, with a slight grin. “You saw that on the disclosure, mate.”

Raleigh was pleased to see him joking through the rest of the afternoon - Chuck seemed to take the role, helping when he needed to but mostly forging a connection with the volunteers. Raleigh remembered being on the other side of this at the Jaeger Academy and presumed Chuck did to. It was plain to Raleigh, at the time, that all of the jocularity was part of the supervisors sizing them up and looking for the intangibles that weren’t going to show up on the brain scans.

He was so pleased that things were working out - for him, as well, it wasn’t like he was a natural with this sort of thing - that he didn’t notice the things he should have. He would want to kick himself, later.

He put his hand on Chuck’s as they started to clean up for the afternoon, carefully sitting the monitoring systems back in their boxes.

Chuck’s hand was cold. Clammy. “You OK?” Raleigh asked, thinking that maybe Chuck was just tired. But then he looked and saw the sweat that was collecting along Chuck’s hairline. “Chuck?” Before Chuck could respond he put his hand to Chuck’s forehead. “You’re burning up.”

“Yeah, I’m fine,” Chuck said. “I took some tylenol.”

“And your fever should have gone down, then,” Tendo said. Raleigh was relieved for the back up. “Come on, then, I’ll give Signe a call.”

“No, I’m.” Chuck’s jaw tightened as he looked at the two of them.

“Chuck-”

“I don’t need-” Chuck protested.

“I know you don’t want to,” Raleigh said. “But you probably need antibiotics or something. Doesn’t mean you’ve got to get stuck in medical again.”

“Besides,” Tendo said, keeping his voice light, “I’m sure you’ve got fond memories of that, yeah, Chuck?” Another sign that Chuck wasn’t well - the blush that the comment likely called up was barely visible against his flushed cheeks.

* * *

“How long?” Signe asked, a bit muffled by the mask over her mouth as she peered down at Chuck on the examination table.

“This afternoon,” Chuck replied. Raleigh arched an eyebrow at him. “This morning.”

“Everything was fine yesterday. Nothing unusual?” Signe leaned in a little bit further.

“Um. Well. I had this kind of pain in my knee…” Chuck said. “But I figured it was just exercise?”

“Turn and stretch,” Signe said, and then she helped guide Chuck over on the examination table. Chuck pulled his leg up and Raleigh leaned in, trying to see if there was anything - he knew what she was looking for and hoped that she wouldn’t find it. “There it is,” she said. Raleigh sighed as Signe guided Chuck’s leg straight. There, in the crook between his knee and thigh, were three red bumps that looked like pimples or bug bites.

Signe became completely professional, then. “Greg, we’re going to need to get samples from each of the pustules,” she said. “Then we’re going to start you on fluids and an IV drip of some vancomycin, because I’m willing to bet that’s MRSA.” Greg, the nurse, went over to a supply closet to get the necessary things ready on a tray.

Raleigh watched as Chuck’s face fell and then he threw it back. He’d barely been out of the hospital for two weeks. Raleigh knew what he was thinking - he’d barely had time to do anything.

“You won’t have to stay here,” Signe said. “Well, I will keep you for tonight. But I can treat you from your room if you are careful.”

“I have been,” Chuck said. “I’ve been showering, fuck, two or three times a day and disinfecting everything and-”

“You’re a high risk individual in a high risk environment,” Signe replied. “It is probably from the rehab equipment.”

“I wipe that down,” Chuck said.

“I am sure you do,” Signe said. “But you do not use bleach and flame throwers.” Not for the first time, Raleigh was relieved she was Chuck’s doctor.

“MRSA isn’t the flesh eating one, right?” Tendo asked.

“No,” Signe said. “But it is very difficult to treat.”

“Fuck!” Chuck said again.

“I’m going to put in a long term I.V., OK?” she said. “It’s a minor surgery - but if you two won’t mind…”

“Sure,” Raleigh said. He looked at Chuck and smiled at him, slow and careful. Signe rolled her eyes at him, and then Raleigh moved closer, pulled his mask up and kissed Chuck on the lips.

“Fuck, Raleigh, I’m not gonna die from an I.V. port,” Chuck said, but Raleigh just smiled at him and then followed Tendo out of the room.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a fairly serious chapter - which is probably why it took forever to write and, for that, I apologize! But I am back in the groove with this fic, so...

Mako would not admit to it, but she had been laying in weight to ambush Raleigh as he headed back to his room from the hospital. “I am sorry to hear about Chuck,” she said.

“Yeah, well…” Raleigh shrugged. “We all knew it was coming, right? Bound to happen sooner or later.”

“I suppose,” Mako said. “It is a difficult way to live.”

“For me?” Raleigh asked. Mako nodded her head. “So is having your brother in your head,” he said. “You can say it, you know.”

“I do not understand Chuck now,” she said. “But I cannot help but be concerned.”

Raleigh nodded his head. That seemed reasonable enough - and he had to remember that Mako had known Chuck a lot longer than he had. “I know he probably won’t deal well-”

“I am not sure you are…” Mako paused, wanting to make sure that she spoke exactly as she wanted to. “You nearly died, again. It is natural to want to be close with someone.” She hoped it communicated many of her concerns - about Raleigh, and Raleigh and his connection to Yancy, how he had recently regained what he had lost, with her, only to lose it again when Gipsy was destroyed. “And Chuck may not be the best choice.”

“He might not be,” said Raleigh. “But right now he is.”

“All right,” Mako said, though she was not sure she was entirely satisfied with this. “I do not mean to be-”

“I know,” Raleigh said, and for a moment something passed between them - a hint of the deep bond that they had twice shared. Dirty and messy, perhaps, but profound. Raleigh smiled at her. “You eat tonight?”

“No,” she said. There had been a lot for her to manage, now that they were potentially going to receive another very large donation - the lawyers had been eager to work out the stipulations for it. Herc had just forwarded her the e-mail. She had smiled at how no communication was necessary to explain what she needed to do with it.

She sent back, _Am I your deputy, then_?

 _Already put the paperwork in, Mori_ , he replied. Mako had smiled slightly. This had never been her goal. But she knew that Stacker would be proud that she was continuing his legacy.

She wondered what legacy Raleigh was looking to continue. Their conversation around dinner did not discuss Chuck but rather his perceptions of those who had volunteered for their drift simulation, how they were both glad for the new influx of a variety of foods into Hong Kong and how Raleigh had worked with Herc to get a newly released movie to be screened for them this coming Friday.

After, she walked to her quarters. She was not surprised to find Tendo there.

“You want to talk about it?” he asked.

“Chuck is - was, maybe - a…” she struggled to find the word in English and scowled, turning to her phone. “Douchebag.”

“There’s still plenty of douchebag in him,” Tendo said, and he sat down on her bed. She sat next to him and took his hand. “Little Becket…” she watched his gaze drift to the distance for a moment, remembering the two Beckets together at some point in Anchorage. “Little Becket always went for that type of guy. Chuck’s pretty good, considering. He’s grown up a lot.”

“I know that,” Mako said. “It is just hard to…”

“I know he hurt you a lot,” Tendo said.

Mako nodded her head. Raleigh would know this as well - but the actions of a fifteen and sixteen year-old could hardly be equated with who he was now. A twenty-one year-old who had survived certain death. Who would not be able to live a full life.

“He seems to really like Raleigh, though,” Tendo said. “I think they’ll be...they’ll be OK.”

Mako nodded again. She acutely felt how young she was when she had these sorts of conversations with Tendo. She was much more mature than her age, because of what she had been through, but that also applied to Tendo - he had lost so many friends, watched so many relationships form and dissolve.

“I would like that for all of us,” she said.

Tendo smiled at her, soft and easy, and then leaned in and kissed her. The kiss was light and easy, almost quiet, and that was what Mako liked about the way that their lovemaking went - even their fucking. There was nothing demanding about it. It managed to be true without being intense. She felt comfortable with him.

He turned and fell back on the bed so that Mako could straddle over him as they kissed. She stroked his hair, working the shape out of it and allowing it to fall into face. “Thank you,” she said.

“For what?” he asked. Mako answered with a deeper kiss.

* * *

Raleigh sat on the bed, pretty sure that Chuck was the sort of person who didn’t want someone stroking his back or giving him encouragement while he vomited. “Christ,” he said, finally, and then Raleigh heard the tap of the water turn on.

“Signe say that would be a side effect?” Raleigh asked as Chuck emerged, the bag of antibiotics and a pump attached to him with a stretchy belt to his waist.

“Probably more, uh, nerves,” Chuck said. He swallowed.

“Yeah,” said Raleigh. “I know. First time we actually got called to strap-in to jockey I went to the bathroom and threw up profusely.”

“Really?” Chuck asked, and Raleigh noticed that despite this setback he was holding his shoulders a little higher and stronger, getting a little bit of his old posture back. Like the fact that this had actually happened - what he had been dreading - he was sort of free from dwelling on it. “I did too. First coupla times, actually.”

Raleigh nodded, tried not to think about a fifteen year-old getting into a Jaeger. Not like he had been that much older or better equipped to deal with the immensity of the task - obviously. And who was, really?

He reached and put a hand on Chuck’s back. Part of him thought that he might brush it away but Chuck just sighed into it. “Does make me feel like shit, though.”

“Yeah, I’ve had I.V antibiotics - not pleasant,” Raleigh said. He sat down on the bed and Chuck followed him. Raleigh had just retrieved him from medical. They weren’t due to work with the volunteers until the afternoon. Chuck was, of course, insisting that he was more than capable of doing it. He seemed to be all right, though, besides the nausea.

Which was a relief, given the talk Signe had given to him. “We have caught it soon,” she said to Raleigh, Chuck, and Herc. “It should respond to the medication, remain localized. But it is possible the boils may grow, may impact the skin. Given the compromised immune system it could also lead to sepsis and necrotizing pneumonia.”

“Those are two things that should not go together,” Chuck said.

“Agreed,” Signe replied. “Treatment will be very aggressive, then. Once we have the result of the sample I may have to change the antibiotic. I want you here tonight to monitor in case there is sepsis.”

Chuck frowned and then nodded his head. “Home sweet home,” he said.

Now, Raleigh rubbed low circles along Chuck’s back, over the edges and whorls of his skin, the patchy segments and those that were still smooth. “You want to go over the initial test results?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Chuck said. They both knew that it wasn’t something that they needed to do - a computer would do the matching for them - but Tendo had said that it was always interesting to look at people’s responses and compare it to what they had thought of anyone. But they didn’t really have a very good grasp on anyone’s personality. A lot of them were new to the Shatterdome and eager to involved in the Drift Technology. Tendo, again, indicated that there were cliques forming and that the Drift-tech people were seen as the cool kids as compared to the engineers who had come in to work with the J-tech.

Raleigh shared this with Chuck and he shook his heads. “It’s like high school, right?” He paused. “Not that I ever...I saw it in movies.”

“Aw, fuck, high school I went to probably can’t be used to compare…” he shook his head. Fifty kids in his class, the building holding everyone from kindergarten on. And his experience wasn’t - Yancy had graduated and started working in the local factory immediately and Raleigh had been determined to make it worth it for him. Yancy should have gone to one of the colleges he got a scholarship to, not stayed around to support Raleigh and Jaz.

“Anyway, always got to be the cool kids, always got to be the nerds or whatever, oi?” Chuck said, flipping through the profiles. “Look at the science nerds. Back when we had a bigger department, you know, there were the ones that liked Newt - not a lot of ‘em, guy is hard to take, you know? - and then there were the Hermann ones, and then we had Gennadiy, this Russian dude, he was a chemical engineer, and most of the reasonable nerds went with him…” Chuck shook his head.

“That’s odd,” Raleigh said, pointing to one particular result. “See that - that’s a lot like…” He pulled out his computer to look at the files that Tendo had sent over for them to get a sense of what they were doing and how the computer matching would work. “These guys are all scientists, largely, right? So you’ve got these common patterns for logic, reasoning, whatever else we’re measuring...but this one is-”

“Looks like an actual pilot,” Chuck said, looking at Raleigh’s screen. There were four profiles on the screen from the initial screening, none of their own. “Real close to that one - who is that?”

“Jesus Vasquez,” Raleigh said. “Matador Fury.”

“Huh,” Chuck said. “Probably gonna have to kick them out, given what they want profiles for.”

“Not combat trained, so probably not,” Raleigh said. “Might be interesting to look at, sort of as a control.”

Chuck leaned in. “You stopped rubbing me.”

“Was I supposed to this whole time?” Raleigh replied, but he smiled.

“Mmm,” Chuck said. “Can we know who it is?”

“Might bias the results,” Raleigh said, resuming the soft circles on Chuck’s back. He liked touching Chuck. It calmed him, just as if he were Max.

“Look at you,” Chuck said. “Slipping right into it, aren’t you?”

“Slipping into what?”

Chuck waved his hand. “Whatever it is they want us to do. Administer. Train.”

“No they,” Raleigh said. “It’s Mako and Herc - and some of the new upper-level scientists, I guess, with the proposals for this stuff. Besides, you want to leave?” He was willing to bet that Chuck’s irritation was more based on the bag of antibiotics being pumped into his body than the task they’d been given.

“Yeah, well,” Chuck said.

“You asked for something to do,” Raleigh added. “I did too. This is what we were qualified for.” He understood what Chuck was getting at, though - had to find something to keep the kids busy.

“I just…” He sighed and looked down. Raleigh kissed at his cheek and kissed at his neck, aware of what Signe had said about the transmission of MRSA as well as how vulnerable Chuck would be to other bacteria at this point. But he knew Chuck responded better to this - _we don’t need to talk about it, I understand._

It wasn’t easy for Raleigh. He’d been dealing with his shit on the wall, yeah, but he had been hiding too. And now it had all changed. Ten years of being invaded by interdimensional monsters, and now they could go back to fighting themselves - that had to be the biggest reason Herc, Mako, and everyone else was keeping the J-Tech patents to themselves. Now they had to redefine everything, and Chuck had it harder than almost all of them.

“Let’s just watch a movie, OK?” Chuck said, when Raleigh pulled away from him. Raleigh nodded.

* * *

Mako walked into Herc’s office with the latest research proposals she had received that had been approved by some of their remaining J-Tech engineers. Herc just had to give them the rubber stamp. Part of her wondered if they were right allowing experimentation with it. Drift technology was one thing. Letting people get their hands on what had made the most lethal killing technology the world had ever seen?

But this, Herc had argued, at least mollified the people who wanted to get their hands on it - they were doing something with it, so no one could claim they were keeping it from the world.

Herc had his head in his hands and looked up at Mako.

“I’m sorry, is this-” she began, but he waved a hand and she sat down across from him. There was quiet for them for what seemed to be a very long moment.

“Tugging around antibiotics with him,” Herc said. “S’not going to be…” He sighed.

“It will be a very difficult road to travel,” Mako agreed. “Chuck is very strong-willed, though.” It was true. If anyone could live with something like this, it was Chuck, and he would make the most out of it.

She set the proposals on his desk and waited. She knew it was not just the infection that had Herc feeling this way.

“He’s so different,” Herc said. Mako nodded her head. “I don’t really have anyone I can say that to.”

Mako nodded again - this would be a conversation that he would have with Stacker. She supposed, that since she was standing in for her sensei in many other ways, she could take along this role as well. There were so few of them left and so many spots.

“I didn’t like who he was,” Herc said. “But I miss him - I hate…”

Mako reached, slowly, as if for a dog she was not sure was friendly. She pat his arm, carefully, once, then twice. Herc met her eyes and his appeared a bit moist.

This was the sort of thing that she was very bad at dealing with. The sort of thing that Sensei had never prepared her for - he had been stoic, even at Tamsin’s death. He had held her close, tucking his head over hers, and then released her. _She’s out of pain,_ he said. Mako knew he had probably grieved, himself, at some point, so that he could put out this careful front.

Herc was not supposed to be like this, either. It made her feel a bit nauseous.

“I understand,” she said, because what he said made sense. “He is still...I see it.” There was still deep determination in Chuck. But his bravado had been burned away. Whatever it was that made him cocky, that made him punch Raleigh, that made him declare on television that the Jaeger program had failed because of mediocre pilots. “We all have to grow up. Sometimes fast.”

“Well,” said Herc. “Nearly dying makes you think about a few things.”

Mako nodded, but felt herself tighten inside - she had not really thought about anything. Wanting to close the Breach. Her oxygen had slowly depleted and then she had passed out and there was nothing. Beautiful and brilliant and nothing. And then she had just been relieved to be alive.

She supposed the adrenaline might have overwhelmed all of that, though, the fact that she had avenged her family and every other family.

“I suppose it does,” she said.

Herc put his hand over hers for a moment. “Seeing him like that…”

“It is why I did not go to see him as often as I should,” she said. She felt better for saying it aloud. The first time she had seen Chuck after his surgeries he had not even seemed human - covered in large blisters, marked with deep holes and boils, his skin red and shedding. Worse was that his face had somehow been protected, as well as other areas of his flesh, little pieces of him that seemed to poke through and remind you of who he had been. Mako had thrown up in the nearest bathroom and then got a soda to compose herself.

“I know,” Herc said. “Thank god for Raleigh, oi? Never thought they’d get on like they have, but it’s good.”

“For Chuck?” Mako asked, and perhaps she should not have pushed.

“For both of them,” Herc said. “I know you drifted with him...how protective you can feel, compared to…” He pressed his lips together and sighed. “Raleigh seems pretty transparent, though. Carries his wounds in the open.”

Herc could be such a dad sometime, it was strange. Mako nodded her head. She did agree - she certainly couldn’t criticize someone for having a relationship as a way to heal.

* * *

“Right, so, today will be easy,” Raleigh told the recruits. They were looking at he, Chuck and Tendo in a very attentive way that Raleigh wasn’t used to. He’d done a few kwoon sessions at the Academy - but a lot of the recruits then had been older than him, and even if they weren’t, they were more in awe of him than ascribing him a degree of authority on something.

A month and a half ago, he thought, he’d been barely surviving a wall that he knew was useless, waiting for the end of the world.

“We just need to do some brain scans while you complete a simple game. The instructions say I am supposed to tell you that it is fun, but…” He shrugged his shoulders.

“Bit like Candy Crush,” Chuck said. “So your mileage may vary.” Raleigh nodded - and he couldn’t help but worry. Did Chuck look pale? Did he look flushed? Was his voice raspy? Did it sound like he needed to cough, like pneumonia might set in?

“Then we’ll be doing a more in-depth scan while you watch a movie,” Raleigh said. “Again, I’m supposed to tell you it’s entertaining.”

“Only twenty minutes, at least,” Chuck said. Tendo nodded.

“We’re going to be around to make sure none of the equipment stops working and to answer any questions, but really you can just sit back today and follow the instructions on your monitors. If all of you could put your PONS units on, we can get things started.”

“Shouldn’t take more than half an hour,” Tendo said. “I know you all are quite busy around here.”

That was it, too - these were people who certainly had more than high school degrees and a certificate from the Jaeger Academy that said you were qualified to pilot a giant mecha robot.

And they respected him.

Raleigh answered a few questions about the games as he drifted amongst their potential recruits - most of them had just thought things through too much. Typical for geniuses, he supposed, or people who did genius level things. He also wondered who their atypical scientist was. He was sure Chuck did as well.

He glanced over as Chuck talked with Tendo. He looked better - Raleigh couldn’t really place what it was. The fact that he had a purpose? What Raleigh had thought earlier about finally getting hit with a bacterial infection? It was good to see, though. Raleigh hadn’t thought that Chuck would take a hit from an infection, but he hadn’t exactly anticipated this type of reaction.

He looked good, too. He’d got his hair trimmed a bit but it was longer and shaggier, presumably to hide the bald spots and his neck - but it suited him. And he had put a little bit of weight back on as well. Raleigh smiled.

Chuck walked over. “What?” he said, though it was soft, inquiring.

“You look good,” Raleigh said.

Chuck looked down. “You don’t-”

Raleigh reached and squeezed his ass. “I wouldn’t say it if I didn’t mean it,” he said.

Chuck nodded his head. “OK,” he said.

“You know that,” Raleigh replied.

“I’m fucking light-headed from this shit,” Chuck said, and knocked at the baggie that was hidden under one of his old t-shirts. Raleigh nodded his head. “Need to go and check in with Signe, after this. Thinks she’ll have the culture back.”

“OK,” Raleigh said. Did that mean that he expected Raleigh to come with him? Or wanted Raleigh to piss off?

“Why don’t you two head over now,” Tendo said. “Pretty sure I can handle getting the pons off of everyone.” He winked at Raleigh when Chuck turned his back.

Raleigh got it - neither of them really knew how to have a relationship. How to be adults. He almost wanted to be a bit offended, but then he remembered that Tendo used to pull the same shit with Yancy as well.

Chuck didn’t say anything as they walked over to medical. “You were there for a lot of shit,” he said, finally, before he went through the door. Raleigh nodded. He had figured that Chuck would have had no problem with kicking Raleigh out if he hadn’t wanted him to be there. “It’s not the kind of thing-”

“This isn’t just about fucking,” Raleigh said.

“OK,” Chuck said, and then he opened the door.

Signe was with one of the Crimson engineers, pulling some stitches out. “It will just be a minute,” she said. She waved them over to another examination room.

“I understand, you know,” Raleigh said. “I wasn’t as...but my body was pretty damaged, from after Knifehead. I missed a lot of it, in the coma, but.” Yancy was lurking around the corners - just mentioning that name seemed to call him forward. He seemed approving, but maybe Raleigh just wanted him to be. Yancy might have liked Chuck. He might not have - Chuck was so many things that Yancy never liked, brash, arrogant, too quick to spout his mouth off and too full of himself.

“I get that,” Chuck said. “It’s just…” He waved his hand as Signe entered the room.

“It is one of the varieties that responds well to treatment with the vancomycin,” she said. “I think though we will need to have separate exercise equipment for you. Those are the sort of environments where these things thrive.”

“OK,” Chuck said. “I think that makes sense.”

“Did you notice an open wound?” It took Raleigh a moment to realize that the question was directed towards both of them.

“Nothing,” Chuck said. Raleigh shook his head as well.

“Once you have a MRSA infection...even though it appears we have got rid of it, it may not be the case. You will need to look, sometime each day, and properly treat anything open with silvedine.”

“That thick stuff?” Chuck said.

“Yes,” Signe said, getting another bag from the closet. Chuck took his shirt off without any command from her. “Your skin is healing nicely. I could bring in a plastic surgeon, perhaps, for a consult on some revision?”

Chuck looked right at her and not at Raleigh. “I thought that any type of exposure-”

“You could discuss the risk,” she said.

Chuck glanced over at Raleigh, then. “No,” he said. “Not gonna die because I wanted to get some of this smoother. Not right now, at least.” He put his hand against a particular mottled, craggy section of his abdomen and trailed it into a large, shallow crater. “Got my cock, got my face.”

“Well, as long as you have your priorities in order,” Signe said. She tossed the old, empty bag aside and replaced it with a new bag. Then she quickly smeared something over the sight where she had put in the I.V port before sealing it with something that had to be medical grade saran wrap. “That feel all right? Comfortable?”

“Yeah,” Chuck said.

Their relationship was interesting, Raleigh thought - and so was the fact that Herc was dating her sister. But then everything was complicated with all of them like that. How many of them were there? And was it really so essential, to understand this experience, being part of that Resistance? Hell, Raleigh had only been part of it for a few days.

“I am adding another antibiotic, just to get full coverage,” said Signe. “We will have to treat for ten days and it should clear up.”

“OK, good,” Chuck said. He leaned back and sighed, then looked over at Raleigh.

“Is that normal?” Raleigh asked.

“For an initial MRSA infection? Yes,” Signe said.

“OK,” Raleigh said.

Signe pressed her lips together for a moment and nodded her head. “It is never an exact science, of course. Why they call it the practice of medicine.”

“Oh,” Raleigh said. He had never thought of that before.

* * *

 

He brought dinner back to his room for he and Chuck and smiled when he saw Chuck sprawled out on his bed with Max, curled into him and tucked next to the side where the I.V was set up. Raleigh carefully tucked the food into the fridge and then decided to leave them to sleep in peace and so he went across the hall to where Mako was watching a movie with Tendo.

“Chuck’s asleep,” he said. “If you don’t…”

“No, of course,” Tendo said.

“Please sit,” Mako added, indicating the small round chair that was in the corner of the room.

Raleigh settled in and smiled. He hadn’t actually spent time with them as a couple and was glad that it felt natural. He chastised himself, slightly, for spending the majority of the past month with Chuck - but someone needed to, and he would probably never say that out loud. He doubted he would have been able to stand slowly peeling and blistering in a small hospital room like that after nearly dying.

Or he hoped it felt natural with Mako and Tendo, at least. It was genuinely nice for his co-pilot and one of his older friends to get together like this. “You guys look good,” he said, and he smiled back at Mako when she recalled when he had said something very similar to her. 


	4. Chapter 4

Raleigh sat and watched while Signe looked at the two smaller, but still angry looking pimples on Chuck’s leg. “We are seeing improvement with the antibiotics,” she said. “But we will still need to continue the I.V. course for the full ten days.”

Chuck sighed and nodded, glancing at the port that had been placed in his chest. “I was reading some stuff,” he said. “Like, even if we cure this spot - it’s still in my system, oi? Another scratch and it’ll pop up.”

“That is very likely, given your immune system,” Signe replied.

Chuck nodded as Signe began to bandage the wound again. They walked out together, Chuck not saying anything. “The fuck?” he said, finally. “We’ve got MRSA just swimming around the Shatterdome?”

“It would seem so,” said Raleigh. The thought was incredibly sobering - made him definitely consider wearing pants from now on when he went down to the gym to work out. Or anywhere, really. You cancel the apocalypse and there are still plenty of things that can take you out.

“Fucking bullshit,” Chuck said, and then he kicked at a random bulkhead. “Ow!”

Raleigh almost reached for him, but then decided it would be best if he didn’t. He put his hands in his pockets and raised his eyebrows, which would have been the reaction he would have given under normal circumstances - you’re dumb enough to kick something hard in sneakers, it’s going to hurt.

Chuck seemed relieved, and he smiled at Raleigh. “Yeah, fuck you too, Becket,” he said.

Raleigh was guilty of it too, he supposed - treating Chuck like he was different, now. His body was, he might have learned some things, but he was still the same Chuck Hansen underneath. “Let’s get lunch, yeah?” he said.

Chuck nodded.

They were still making special plates up for him - today was plain mashed potatoes, a pork chop, and some broccoli. And the signature PPDC blue jello, which Chuck just poked at and frowned when it wobbled. “For years they kept trying to insist this shit was a proper dessert,” he said.

“There are some chemicals in it meant to replicate the taste of sugar,” Tendo replied. He poked at his own jello.

“I think I could have handled the cake,” Chuck said, and pouted.

“I can get you some,” Raleigh replied - after all, a piece of vanilla cake with some frosting couldn’t do that much damage. Chuck had thrown up before from quantity of TimTams, rather than the cookies themselves. Chuck gave him what Raleigh thought might be an attempt at puppy-dog eyes. “I will,” he said. “And you should study Max for optimal effect.”

“Fuck off,” Chuck said.

“I studied our neighbor’s labrador, is all I am saying,” Raleigh said, and stood to go and get the cake.

He pretty much bumped into Elin when he was up at the dessert bar. She smiled at him.

Raleigh liked her, he thought - she seemed good for Herc. Smart, but reserved, sweet, calm. Not that Raleigh really had a dog in that fight. _Although, actually,_ he thought. _You do. Maybe._ He felt slightly nauseous, that he was already thinking that way about Chuck.

“Hej hej, Raleigh,” she said. “The dessert looks good, you think?”

“Getting some for Chuck,” Raleigh said. “Don’t tell your sister.”

“Mmm,” said Elin, and she smiled at him and pushed her glasses up on her nose as she considered the dessert offerings.

“Just don’t get the jell-o,” said Raleigh.

“I sort of like it?” Elin said. “Perhaps because I have not spent years eating it.” She shrugged her shoulders and then smiled at him again. Raleigh grabbed a piece of cake, nodded at her, and returned it to Chuck.

“There you go,” he said, and sat down next to him and put a hand on his thigh. Chuck nodded, but he was watching as Elin returned to her seat next to Herc with the blue jell-o. “Figures,” he said.

“Nice to see Herc with someone,” Tendo mused, then looked up, realizing what he had said in front of Chuck. “I mean-”

“No,” Chuck said softly. “Should be happy. Deserves it.”

Raleigh looked down, not wanting to meet Chuck’s eyes - he hadn’t even heard him talk about his mother, only peripheral mentions when he had sat in the hospital room with him. His daddy issues made it pretty obvious that he had adored his mother and had some serious survivor’s guilt over the whole thing.

“Plus she’s Scandinavian. Probably into some really kinky shit,” said Chuck, and he grinned.

“That’s stereotyping,” said Tendo.

“Not if it’s true,” said Chuck. He made a slight moaning sound as he ate a bite of his vanilla cake. “Thanks,” he said to Raleigh. “You’re the best.”

There was a little more meaning in it then seemed immediately evident - or maybe Raleigh just wanted it to be that way. He always did this, though, got too caught up in things early on and imagined things ending happily ever after. And Chuck was really so messed up.

“I try,” he replied, and leaned back, meeting Tendo’s eyes and shrugging.

Later, Chuck pushed Raleigh down onto the bed and kissed him aggressively, hands working over his body, hungry for something. Raleigh froze when he wondered - _should we be doing this?_

“Swapping spit’s got nothing to do with MRSA,” Chuck said to him. “Neither does my dick in your ass.” Raleigh grinned - this was something Chuck might have said if they had fucked before Pitfall, before he had been vulnerable.

“Good,” he murmured, agreeing to it. There would have to be some reconciliation, he supposed, a different Chuck that emerged over the next few weeks.

“Yeah?” Chuck said, and sucked on his neck.

Despite the way he had presented things he was gentle as he prepped Raleigh, peppering him with kisses and then light and deft with his fingers. Raleigh groaned as he slowly explored the various parts of Raleigh’s interior, found his prostate and made him squirm.

And Chuck did feel more solid - but it might be because his ribs were healed enough he could kneel in front of Raleigh and fuck him, slow and steady, hips instinctively finding a rhythm that made both of them ache and moan for each other. “So fucking good,” Raleigh said. “So gorgeous.”

This made Chuck falter, then stop, and he swallowed. “Raleigh-”

“I don’t just say things,” Raleigh said. Chuck nodded. He knew this. Raleigh felt his stomach churn a bit - it didn’t matter what he said, he wasn’t ever going to make Chuck believe it. He probably hadn’t believed it before.

Chuck thrust harder - perhaps trying to confirm Raleigh’s though. “Fuck, yes,” Raleigh said, because he needed that and it felt amazing. “So good, Chuck.”

Chuck held his eyes and they fucked for what seemed like forever, each stroke of his cock long and smooth and just grazing Raleigh’s prostate. Then Raleigh shifted and Chuck did something with his hips and Raleigh was making loud, undignified noises and his orgasm was crashing towards him. Chuck held his eyes through it and then came inside him almost simultaneously.

Raleigh kissed at the ridges of skin along his neck and down his collarbone. “You saying it,” Chuck said, softly. “It doesn’t make it true.”

“I know,” Raleigh replied. It was like Pentecost telling him he could get back in a Jaeger after Yancy had...and none of them had known.

“Good,” Chuck said. He curled a little tighter into Raleigh.

Raleigh stroked his hair and put a movie on for them to watch.

* * *

“So, we have initial compatibility matches,” said Chuck, looking over the paperwork. “Then what we need to do is put them through more difficult paces to see if they can actually drift together.”

“How many?” Raleigh asked.

“Six possible pairings,” said Chuck. “S’not bad, if they just need data.”

“Lots of disappointed people,” said Raleigh.

“Why does everyone want to drift, anyway?” Chuck said.

Raleigh considered this - and it was possible that Chuck had been too young, maybe, to read all of the articles the glamorized the process. Chuck hadn’t wanted to become a Jaeger pilot because he wanted to be a rock star.

“They’re all scientists,” Raleigh said. “Basic curiosity, I guess?”

Chuck scowled at this. “Scientists, right,” he said.

“But I think everyone - it’s such a strange idea, right?” Raleigh asked, and then realized that for Chuck, it might not be. He had been around eleven or twelve when Herc had started drifting with other people.

Chuck shrugged his shoulders. “So do we send e-mails out, or what?”

“I suppose so,” Raleigh said.

“Mako’s just going to write her own anyway,” Chuck replied. “Especially since she’s the fucking Deputy Marshall now.”

Raleigh almost opened his mouth - but then figured that Chuck had the right to be grumpy.

“Yeah,” he said. “I’ve never been very diplomatic.” Chuck huffed at this and sort of smiled at Raleigh, then flipped up the screen on his laptop.

* * *

 

“Marshall Mori?”

“We have worked together for a long time, Doct-Hermann, we can use given names?” Mako said - she hoped it would work, that Dr. Geiszler was still Dr. Geiszler as part of the strange relationship between the two of them. Raleigh had said they were frenemies, and she agreed.

“Yes,” said Hermann. “Conversationally, at least.”

“Was your question...casual?” Mako asked, slowly.

Hermann leaned over to kiss the top of the sleeping baby Siggy’s head before returning to some of the paperwork. “Indeed,” he said. “I have asked Vanessa about this but thought another response may helpful. Newton is having some...relationship difficulties and I struggle to adequately offer assistance to him.”

“Ah,” said Mako. “With Talya?” They seemed so suited to each other. Mako knew that Newt had had a crush on Cherno’s engineer for some time, and she seemed to return the affection.

“Their affection does not wane,” said Hermann. “Talya is a brilliant engineer and, in times of war, people cared little for qualifications when one achieved results.” Mako nodded - she knew this better than anyone. “But Talya believes - correctly, I would agree - that her reputation will only carry her so far in five or ten years time. She would like to go to MIT or CalTech to get a PhD.”

“Ah,” said Mako. “Either place would be happy to have Dr. Geiszler?”

“Of course,” said Hermann. “I’ve been given innumerable offers myself. But both Dr. Geiszler and I have…”

“Yes,” Mako said. She understood that sense of loyalty all too well.

“As you can imagine, Newton is not reacting to this in a rational manner.”

“Yes,” said Mako again. “They have not been dating very long, though. Talya would be…” Mako wasn’t sure how to phrase this. She remembered Tamsin putting her hands on Mako’s shoulders in the hospital in Hawaii. _Never make an important decision for a boy. Or a girl,_ she said. _Always only make them for yourself. It will work out in the end, if it’s meant to be._ Mako nodded, sensing she was speaking of Luna and herself.

“I said the same thing,” said Hermann. “Newton, unfortunately, is not very experienced in relationships and believes this to be...cataclysmic.”

Mao repeated to Hermann what Tamsin had told her. “Also we may not be in Hong Kong for long,” she said. “Many wish to turn it into a museum. Los Angeles has offered use of the Shatterdome again and with Oblivion Bay there it would be a logical move.”

“Mmm,” said Hermann. “This may calm some of his fears. I believe that he seems to think it will be difficult for him to find another woman.”

“Well,” Mako said. “She is brilliant and beautiful.”

Hermann considered this and nodded his head. The baby began to stir, then, and issued a small crying sound. Siggy rarely made a lot of noise - she was definitely a Gottlieb. And Hermann seemed to intrinsically understand each of her small noises, efficiently determining whether she needed to be fed, changed, or entertained. Very much like the Sims game Mako had played when she was younger - but those children had made a good deal more noise.

When he came back he didn’t speak any more about things, so Mako presumed she had been helpful in some fashion. Mako supposed that since Hermann had opened up to her, perhaps she should reciprocate.

“I have my doubts about Raleigh and Chuck,” she said.

“Oh?” Hermann asked, moving paperwork into piles.

“I think that neither really has thought…” she pressed her lips together, not sure what she wanted to say. “Their attraction is based on emotions felt at a serious time.”

“I can understand that,” Hermann said. “Ranger Becket - Raleigh - seems to have a big heart. He volunteered to sit with Chuck and…” Hermann also pressed his lips together. “It is difficult. Chuck is very difficult.”

Mako nodded, remembering the time Chuck had chewed Hermann out in a meeting updating Striker’s tech. “Raleigh is not.”

“Perhaps he enjoys a challenge,” Hermann said.

Mako hadn’t considered this. Her own relationship felt natural and easy. She would not like to be dealing with Chuck Hansen’s temper, as different as it was, after what had happened - or with the difficulties inherent in his injuries. “It is so much to take on. And Chuck is inexperienced.”

“It’s good you’re concerned,” Hermann said. “I do not mean that to sound condescending. But you must keep in mind - all of the data that Raleigh has, uh, input about Chuck is much different from your own inputs. He’s working from a completely different set of information, not to mention his own filters, so his conclusions will be quite different.”

Mako actually smiled - no one had explained it to her in a way that made sense like that before, even though she knew Tendo and Herc had been saying the same things. “Yes,” she replied. “Thank you.”

Hermann looked a bit surprised that he had helped, but he nodded his head. They worked for ten or fifteen minutes before he said, “As more personnel is being brought in and, uh, vetted, Mako - you should perhaps consider getting a degree yourself.”

She looked up from her paperwork and met his eyes. “Perhaps,” she said. “I enjoyed building Gipsy,” she said. “But I am not sure I am suited for a life in the academy.” She did not want to insult Hermann, who she suspected would have preferred the life of a professor. But she was more practical than many academics she had met, and she didn’t want to experiment - she wanted tangible results.

“Well,” Hermann said. “You certainly have the, ah, aptitude.”

“I very much appreciate that,” she said.

* * *

Chuck injected himself with another round of antibiotics and looked at himself in the mirror.

Raleigh tried not to be obvious about observing this, but it was hard not to when Chuck was just wearing a pair of loose sweatpants. He was beginning to get muscle definition, had made a sterile room with his own gym equipment and resumed his workouts two or three days ago. He looked good, Raleigh thought. The sharp colors of his scars were fading and blending back into the rest of his pale skin, though he was still quite patchworked.

“What?” Chuck asked, turning and looking at Raleigh. He had his hand over where his missing nipple would have been and the look on his face was...unpleasant.

“Just…” Raleigh said. “You look good. You’re looking better.”

“Gee, thanks, Raleigh,” Chuck said, drawling out his name and reminding Raleigh of the first time they had met. “Thanks for noticing.”

“Just an observation,” Raleigh said, and suddenly, he felt tired. There was only so much he could legitimately carry. _Martyr,_ he heard Yancy say. _Always doing everything for everyone else._ His voice sounded so clear - Raleigh almost looked to see if he was seated next to him, and then he swallowed.

Yancy had been gone for awhile, now. _Just looking out for you, little bro._

“Yeah, well, that’s great,” said Chuck. “Observe the freak.”

“You’re not-”

“Oi, fuck off trying to boost my self esteem, Ray. I’m a fucking mess,” Chuck said. His jaw was set square and determined and it was clear that these thoughts had cycled through his head for some time now. “And, yeah, you’re a fucking mess too but it’s different. You’re not gonna to get sick for the rest of your life, yeah? Not gonna always have to get tested, make sure you don’t have some cancer.”

Raleigh held eye contact with Chuck - but it would probably be good for him to get this out of his system. “You don’t need to just stand around and - you’re Raleigh fucking Becket. Don’t give me all that mushy bull shit about liking me, or whatever, either. You really want to deal with all of this?” He waved his hand over the used syringe, the dressing he needed to put over the permanent injection sight that Signe had built for him.

“Right now, it’s...yes,” Raleigh said. He knew what was implicit in the question and what Chuck wouldn’t say - _you really want to deal with this for the rest of your life?_ It was much too early to say.

“Yeah, well, that’s great,” said Chuck. “Go fuck yourself, Raleigh - I know you’re getting all the points, right now, dating the mutant. But it’s gonna get fucking old.”

“Do you not want to...do this anymore?” Raleigh asked, swallowing.

“Just...just...I don’t know, OK?” Chuck said. “Just leave me alone.”

Raleigh gathered up his things and nodded his head. He walked out without looking at Chuck, inhaling and exhaling to maintain his cool exterior. He clenched his hand into a fist once he got outside, though - who was Chuck to decide what he wanted and didn’t want? What was going to get old for him?

He had to remind himself of everything that Chuck was going through while he walked - and about what Mako had told him about Chuck. Well, warned him about Chuck, and she had certainly called this particular outburst.

Still, it wasn’t like Mako would be smug about this. But - he didn’t want to confirm that she was right about things, either.

He walked to Tendo’s office. Well, more stomped to Tendo’s office.

* * *

She was surprised Tendo was not at dinner to meet her. He was always punctual or made sure to send her a text message.

“Mako,” said Signe, who was must have sensed her discomfort. “Come. Sit with me. I am tired of the love birds.”

“Are they?” she asked. She really hadn’t seen Elin and Herc that much, aside from at the bar. He seemed very courteous and sweet, but nothing she would associate with overbearing types of public displays of affection.

“They are cute together,” Signe said. “Good for them.”

Mako nodded, remembering that Signe had lost her partner - significant partner - some years ago. She sat down with her tray and gave her a smile.

“Still buried in paperwork, then?” she asked.

“Very,” said Mako.

“Ah, should have congratulated you! Deputy Marshal.”

Mako blushed. Everyone had been doing that since the e-mail had went out and she honestly had no good way to respond. She did not have the position because she had earned it but only because literally anyone else who could have filled it was dead.

“Of course,” Signe said, and nodded her head. “I’m sorry.”

Mako met her eyes, wondering if she was a telepath. “You have to have good bedside manner,” Signe said. “When you specialize in trauma and radiation.”

“Ah,” Mako said. “Yes. The doctor that Tamsin Sevier had, in Hawaii - he was not so good.”

“Chen?” Signe asked. Mako nodded her head. “Was a bastard. Only got into it to publish the papers. Work with the PPDC. He left, of course, when the money ran out. I think Stanford took him in.” She shook her head.

This would explain, Mako thought, how she had got Chuck to open up to her. She felt a swell of affection for Signe and hoped that she would be able to stay with Chuck for the foreseeable future.

Tendo sat down next to her, then, and she was surprised she had not seen or heard him approach. “Good,” he said. “Consolidation.”

“What?” Mako said.

“Finally happened. Chuck lost it. Sort of broke up with Raleigh.”

Mako closed her eyes, resisting the urge to feel right about things. She opened them to see Signe shaking her head. “Not surprised. He likes him, so he wants to protect him from a future with…” She shook her head.

“Just spent the past two hours with Baby Becket - sorry, s’why I didn’t text,” Tendo said. Mako nodded her head. This was understandable.

“Raleigh is upset?” she asked.

“Plotting grand romantic things to win him back?” Signe asked.

“Let’s hope not,” Tendo replied. “Fuck, he gets a boombox over his head-” Signe interrupted, laughing at this. “What?”

“That dates you,” she said.

“Hey, I’m not as old as you, Denmark,” he replied. “I just have an appreciation of classic romantic comedies - more appropriate would have been...fuck, whatever the scene was in Ten Things I Hate About You.”

“We just watched that,” Mako said, in an attempt to keep things light.

She frowned. Raleigh could have come and talked to her, even she had been more pessimistic about he and Chuck together. Well, more pessimistic about Chuck. But she would still have been supportive of him.

“He’ll come, I’m sure,” Tendo said, and he squeezed her thigh. “When you have this kind of stuff happen, you want different people when you feel different ways.”

“Yes,” Mako said, though she really didn’t have much experience with that at all.

* * *

Raleigh sat and stared at the wall.

_You didn’t do anything wrong, kiddo,_ Tendo said.

But what if he had? He’d been the one to push Chuck towards this, he was sure now. He had been selfish, growing to feel affectionate towards him when he had been so vulnerable. He’d basically asked for this.

And if he hadn’t done anything wrong - that meant this was all on Chuck, like Chuck wasn’t mature enough for this sort of thing. Like Chuck really was too damaged to behave like an adult. That was what Tendo had always meant during his past relationship advice sessions when he doled out that line.

_Fuck,_ Raleigh thought. _If Yancy were here he would know what to do._ Real flesh and blood Yancy, not the imprint of him left inside Raleigh’s head - memories that merged together into something that seemed to be conscious.

The door opened to his room and Raleigh startled, because for a moment he thought it had been Yancy - which was so incredibly stupid, but…

Instead, Herc Hansen literally poked his head in. “Let him stew for tonight,” he said. “Take him for a walk tomorrow.”

“Like Max?” Raleigh said.

Herc gave him a slight grin before closing the door. “Exactly like Max.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this is short, and took forever, and I apologize. Life has been quite hectic lately!

“Chuck’s anger is often directed at the wrong people,” Mako said, sliding Raleigh a cup of coffee.

Raleigh looked up at her and smiled. He knew that Mako was skeptical about their relationship, but he understood. She wanted the best for him. And she had known Chuck for far longer.

“I know,” Raleigh said.

“You are planning a grand romantic gesture?” she asked.

Raleigh pressed his lips together. “Herc told me to just take him for a walk.”

Mako nodded. “He would not like anything more, I do not think.”

Raleigh nodded back, though he wasn’t so sure. He had seen how much Chuck had appreciated the various things people brought him once he was out of containment - the Tim Tams, stuffed Max’s, and other items. Tangible proof seemed to work a lot better for Chuck than just words, which made a lot of sense.

Tangible, but not grand, but not something that seemed avoidant. Raleigh wasn’t quite sure what that might be, especially considering how worried Chuck was that he was going to spend too much of his life worried about Chuck and getting sucked down by Chuck’s health issues.

He took a sip of his coffee and smiled at Mako. “I agree, I think,” he said. “I’m thinking about what to do.”

“You know he will not be the one to…”

“Romantic advice?” Tendo asked, sliding in next to Mako and smiling at her.

“Is this going to be a group effort?” Raleigh asked, swallowing. “Because I’m not sure if I want you on the committee.” Tendo laughed, but Mako reached forward and smacked his hand gently. “Just like you talk about Chuck…”

“Now, now, Becket,” said Tendo. Raleigh just grinned at him.

“I am aware of Tendo’s past...indiscretions,” said Mako. “It was hard not to, working with him.”

_Right,_ Raleigh thought, because he had forgot about that. He still kept forgetting that they had all had lives for the past five years while had been hiding on the wall, listening to his dead brother in his head.

He was surprised Yancy hadn’t come out yet - but he was probably waiting for when Raleigh was alone. Which might be why he was sitting in the cafeteria. Newt and Hermann had both already stopped by to offer their advice.

He was surprised that he didn’t feel more bothered by the whole thing, or more anxious. It wasn’t that he was confident that Chuck would agree to...well, had they broken up? Or just had a fight? No one seemed to really be sure. Regardless, he felt somewhat sanguine about the whole thing and couldn’t help but wonder if that was a bad thing. It seemed like it should be a bad thing.

Or you can handle either result, Yancy said. There he was. Raleigh was a little relieved - and how fucked up was that?

“Indiscretions if overly kind,” Raleigh said. “Especially when you consider that one time when he took that one group on a tour of the Jaegers-”

“Raleigh,” said Tendo, and Raleigh grinned.

“It never happened,” he said to Mako.

She shook her head at him and then looked at his empty plate and empty cup of coffee. Raleigh met her gaze - yes, he was aware that Chuck was not going to initiate any type of reconciliation.

“I’m just waiting on something,” he said.

“So you went for grand romantic gesture,” Tendo said, and sort of shook his head.

“No,” Raleigh said, even though he had. “Well.”

“Hmmm,” said Mako, and then she shrugged her shoulder. “You know him best, in that regard.” Raleigh quirked a grin in her direction - that way that she said it was so plain, but there was definite judgment there. _Shady, shady Mako Mori,_ he thought.

* * *

“Mori,” said Herc, sitting down across from her. “Doctor Gottlieb. Siggy.”

The baby made a slight sound, waking a bit and then snuggling back into the carrier that was in a chair next to Hermann.

“She’s quite calm,” said Herc. “Seems to sleep well.”

“Very,” said Hermann.

“Chuck wasn’t,” Herc said, and sighed slightly. “Wasn’t anything...no colic, or whatever, you know? Just awake and fussy about it all the time, got bored so easily. Thought that it would be a relief when he could start to, uh, entertain himself but…”

Hermann considered this. “It is not uncommon for children with advanced intelligence,” Hermann said. “Dr. Geiszler’s mother once told me that he was much the same way.”

“And you?” Mako asked, curious.

“Much like that, I suppose,” said Hermann. “I was watched by a series of nannies, and they often did not report on my daily activities to my mother.”

“Ah,” said Herc. He looked at Mako, who just raised her eyebrows. Clearly Hermann and Vanessa had a much different approach to parenting.

“I have not given Raleigh any advice,” Mako said. She presumed that Herc was here to speak to her, because he had said her name - her surname - first and had sat down at her desk looking a bit aggrieved.

“No, well, I tried,” said Herc. “Told him to take the kid for a walk with a dog. But then Signe reminded me he’s not supposed to be going anywhere, all the drugs and stuff she’s got him on, so…”

“Yes,” Mako said, when Herc did not supply anything further.

“Then she gave me a...talk,” said Herc.

“Dr. Lauritsen?” Mako asked. Herc nodded his head.

“About Ms. Lauritsen?” Hermann asked. Herc nodded his head again.

“A shovel talk,” Mako said. She had learned a lot of her English watching Buffy the Vampire Slayer - it was one of Tamsin’s favorite television shows.

“Yeah,” Herc said. “Didn’t expect that. S’not like I’ve been, uh, doing anything…” He waved his hand. Mako was sure that he hadn’t. He seemed to be quite the gentlemen, which was interesting. She had not got this impression from Herc when she had met him when she was still a teenager. She had assumed he was like many of the other pilots at the time, drinking and involved in ridiculous activities.

“I would take this to be a sign that Ms. Lauritsen is quite fond of you,” Hermann said.

Herc turned his head slowly, as if he didn’t understand. It took Mako a moment to realize that it wasn’t what Hermann said but the fact that Hermann had said something like that. She gave a minute shrug to her shoulders. A looming apocalypse made people behave certain ways. A world where that was not a concern were bound to bring out different sides of them.

“I have become quite astute at speaking about relationships,” Hermann said, pushing his glasses up his nose. “Dr. Geiszler frequently talks about his and asks for advice.”

“Russians are due back soon, oi?” Herc asked.

“Tomorrow,” said Mako. “This talk-”

“Didn’t imply I was...but did imply that I better not treat her sister poorly,” said Herc.

“I would not fuck with Dr. Lauritsen,” said Hermann. This time Herc’s lip twitched slightly. “Is that not the expression?”

“It is the expression,” Mako said.

“She is a formidable woman,” Hermann said. “She has often spoke to me about her younger sister and is rather protective of her.”

“Ah,” said Herc. “Suppose she is. Just wasn’t expecting it, you know.”

“Then her sister has likely revealed how she feels about you,” Mako said, agreeing with Hermann.

Herc looked between them and then sort of smiled. “OK,” he said. “Just...didn’t really think about it, before. Dating my son’s doctor’s sister.”

Mako nodded her head. Their lives were all convoluted, though, there were so few of them left. Everyone was entangled to some degree.

“Of course,” Hermann said, “Ms. Lauritsen is very formidable in her own way. She is a leading practitioner in her field.”

“I sense some slight, uh…” Herc began.”

“Disdain,” Mako filled in. “She does not have a phD?”

“No,” Herc said, glancing at Hermann. “Practitioner.”

Hermann blushed, slightly, and then realized they were taking the piss out of him. “Many of my most esteemed colleagues do not have terminal degrees,” he said. “And Dr. Geiszler certainly proves that they do not correlate to practical experience and capability.” He sniffed.

Mako smiled at him, and then it occurred to her - she was all Herc had, wasn’t she? At least for right now. Not like he could talk to Chuck about his own relationship when Chuck was….well, whatever was going on with he and Raleigh.

“You like Ms. Lauritsen very much,” she said.

“I didn’t say-” Herc began, the narrowed his eyes at her.

“You would not be concerned about this shovel talk if you did not,” said Mako. Sensei did not speak with her often about his friendships, but he had mentioned that Herc had never given himself the chance to really become involved with anyone since Angela.

It made sense. They were safe, now - more than likely for the foreseeable future, according to Dr. Gottlieb and their new scientists as well as several independent research teams. Herc didn’t have to worry about something happening like what had happened between Dr. Lauritsen and her partner, between countless other people that Mako had known.

“I do,” Herc said, slowly. “Very bright...good sense of humor, uh.”

“That is of critical importance,” Hermann said.

“Are you concerned about anything?” Mako asked.

Herc scratched at the back of his neck, and he reminded her so much of Sensei in that moment - so confused by most human relationships, so much better at relating to a machine the size of a skyscraper. To use technology to mediate their relationships. “Bit used up, you know,” he said.

Mako looked to Hermann for guidance with this. She was not sure how to deal with that in the slightest. It was true that Herc had been through the wars - quite literally - but he was still, she was certain, an objectively fit, handsome man with a good heart.

“Aren’t we all?” Hermann asked. Herc blinked at him as though he were a bit stupid. “Some of our scars are more visible, perhaps, but no one our age, Hercules, has come out of the past fifteen years unscathed. And given the particular...er, visibility of your scars, I am sure Ms. Lauritsen is aware…” He waved his hand.

“Huh,” said Herc.

“There is much you have to offer, now that there is peace as well,” Mako said, carefully. Herc wasn’t just some Jaeger pilot.

He nodded. “Sometimes I’m pretty sure we’re not really saying the same thing.”

“How could you possibly be?” Hermann asked. “One of you is Australian and the other is Danish, and trust me, I have it on quite good authority - and based on several of my own personal observations, in fact - that the Danes are quite odd.” He sniffed.

Herc sort of laughed, then smiled. “She said the same like about Germans.”

“She would,” Herman said.

Mako laughed, realizing that they had moved out of the serious portion of the discussion and feeling relieved. She did not want to dwell on these sorts of things, not yet. She was still enjoying what peace, what relief felt like. She was still mourning.

* * *

“Go, Max, go,” Raleigh said. “Find Chuck.”

Max stared at him and wagged his tail, presumably at the word Chuck. _Goddamnit,_ Raleigh thought, wasn’t the dog always with Chuck when he wasn’t in medical? But, of course, the one time…

“Chuck!” he said, and waved his hands. “Go to Chuck!”

Max’s tongue lolled out of his mouth.

Raleigh sighed and sat down in the chair in his room while Max continued to stare at him. He clicked around on Amazon for a bit, not for anything in particular, but he had money now and for the first time in five years - no, longer - he could buy things. He could get...t-shirts, books, mugs to drink his coffee out of with stupid sayings on them, or a stupid sticker for his car that said _My Other Car is a Jaeger._

He sighed and turned and looked at Max. “Find. Chuck.” He waved his hands harder.

Max went over and laid at his feet. Raleigh scratched his ears. _Poor dumb thing,_ he thought.

“This isn’t going to work if you don’t go and get Chuck,” said Raleigh, and he sighed.

“For what?”

Raleigh and Max both looked up, Max happily thumping his tail. _You found me!_ he seemed to be saying.

“Uh,” Raleigh said. Max wouldn’t even move towards Chuck then, the dumb little...then Raleigh thought, _no. That is too cute._ But it almost seemed like Max knew Chuck wouldn’t come to him, unless there was a significant motivating factor, like retrieving his emotional sinkwell.

Max turned his head and Chuck did as well. “What?” he said, and moved towards him. Max trotted over to him, pleased. “What is this?”

“It’s a key,” Raleigh said, softly.

“With a fucking bow,” Chuck said.

“Yeah,” Raleigh said. “He was supposed to go find you.”

“With a key to your door.”

Raleigh nodded his head and winced slightly. He had been warned off grand romantic gestures and Chuck’s expression seemed to indicate why this would be the case.

“Right,” said Chuck.

“So you have your own room,” Raleigh said. They were creating a makeshift suite for Chuck so he could have an exercise room to himself where he could also wash his own laundry - and that would certainly be interesting. “And can come to mine.”

“Oh,” Chuck said. He pressed his lips together.

Raleigh waited for a moment, hoping for more of a reaction - some kind of feedback.

“So, you don’t want…” Chuck said, finally.

“I just thought,” Raleigh said, “that...you were worried, about me being too...because you were frustrated about not being - or, about being worried about…”

“Oh,” Chuck said. He considered this, and then looked at Max - as though the dog was going to give him some kind of guidance.

“If I don’t want to be with you, it’s not going to be because of your festering wounds or weird looking skin or how sick a cold makes you, OK?” Raleigh said.

“So it would be some personality defect,” Chuck said. Raleigh smiled and nodded his head and Chuck smiled and nodded back at him. Then his eyes followed Max as he got into the dog bed that Raleigh had bought him in the corner of the room. “Is that pink?”

“It was the only one I could find in the local stores,” Raleigh said. It was pink with darker pink dog bones on it, actually. “I got him a squeaky Mutavore. Lady at the shop said they had a whole Striker Eureka collection.” Of course they would - they’d killed all those kaiju. None of them would have brought down pilots, too much of the cities they had attacked.

“Huh,” Chuck said, and Max obligingly squeaked the Mutavore toy for him. “You think that might be a bit odd?”

“More than,” Raleigh said. “But it had all sorts of squeakers in it and crinkly paper and I was told it was ideal for dog play and intellectual development.”

Chuck turned his head very slowly, as if concerned for Raleigh. “Not many people refer to Max and intellectual development in the same sentence.”

Raleigh shook his head at Chuck. “You should have more faith in him,” he said.

“Yeeah, Ook,” Chuck said, drawing it out. “I gotta…” He nodded at the bathroom and then grazed his lips across Raleigh’s before turning it into a deeper kiss. Raleigh suspected that he was going to use that as his out if it turned out Max had gone traitor and was with the enemy. _Thanks for finding my dog, Becket, now I gotta piss._

Raleigh sat back down on the bed and smiled at Max while Chuck used the bathroom. “Not bad, eh?” he asked.

“You have my soap in your shower,” Chuck said, emerging.

“Yeah,” Raleigh said. “In case you want to...shower here. Don’t have to drag it back and forth.”

“Huh,” Chuck said. Then he smiled. “Goddamnit, Raleigh.”

“Sorry,” Raleigh said, smiling back.

* * *

Raleigh put his head on Chuck’s naked chest, sighing softly.

“So that’s make-up sex?” Chuck asked.

“Yup,” Raleigh said, and there was no hiding the pleasure from his voice. Chuck ran his fingers through his hair.

“You are such a cunt sometimes,” Chuck said. It was full of affection. But then Raleigh grazed his hand against the permanent I.V. port, and Chuck exhaled slightly. “No, don’t apologize, just...sensitive. Itchy.”

“Yeah,” Raleigh said. It looked like it might be, and he knew Chuck was doing his damndest not to scratch any part of his skin.

“You know Signe gave Herc the shovel talk?” Chuck asked.

This made Raleigh sit up, intrigued. “Really?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Chuck said, grin slowly pulling across his face. “Better not hurt her sister, that sort of thing. Herc must have just about…” He shook his head. “Maybe actually shat himself. He’s not good with…”

Raleigh nodded his head. Chuck had clearly been attempting to lighten the mood. “I bet Signe can be quite...persuasive.”

“Hell, Elin isn’t some shrinking violet,” Chuck said. “She’s just a bit more reserved.” Raleigh wasn’t so sure about this - but he would take Chuck’s word for it.

“You’ve...talked with her?” Raleigh asked. He’d only seen Chuck interact with Elin in the bar, and that had always been in a group setting.

“Not really,” Chuck said. “Best to let...s’already weird enough, you know?”

“I suppose so,” Raleigh said. “It’s not going to get any...less weird, though.” Chuck just hummed, stroking his hair with a bit more vehemence. Then he stopped. “What?”

“Are those…little stairs, next to the bed?” Chuck asked.

“They might be,” Raleigh replied.

“Those are little Max stairs, next to the bed?”

“Yes,” Raleigh said, and Chuck groaned. “What? He...that sad little sound he makes.”

“Oh, Raleigh,” Chuck said.


End file.
